The Slumber Party
by Appy4la
Summary: Alice and Rosalie invite Bella over to a sleepover. What will happen? Normal slumber party? I think not...
1. The Invitation

Author's Note: Hi! This story might get pretty silly. If you liked 'Amusement Parks With the Cullens" then you should enjoy this too!

_The Slumber Party_

_Chapter 1 - Invitation_

Friday. A perfectly normal day for Bella Swan. Or so she first thought. The thought was banished quite early in the morning when she got a phone call.

_Brrrriinngg! Brrrriiinggg!_

Bella slammed the sleep button on her alarm clock. To put it nicely, she was very disgruntled to find that didn't stop it. She picked up her alarm clock and was preparing to throw it across the room when she realized it was the phone.

She jumped up and ran to the nearest phone.

"Hello?" Bella said, trying to keep the sleepiness out of her voice.

"Bella!" Cheered the voice on the other end. "Why are you so tired? Is that any way to greet the day? You don't want to be tired today!"

"Hi Alice." Bella said more enthusiastically. She peered out the window nearby and saw sunny skies. Her mood dropped. "Why don't I want to be tired today?" She asked Alice.

"Because!" Alice chirped, "We're going to have a slumber party tonight! Rosalie and me! And I want you to come too! Will you?"

"Uh, sure," Bella said, thinking this could be fun. "I just have to ask Charlie… err, my Dad."

"Don't worry about it." Alice assured Bella. "He'll agree. I'm very good at guessing what people will say."

"Vision, huh?"

"That too."

"See you at five! And you don't have to bring anything!" Alice said enthusiastically. "And don't eat dinner!"

"Ok," Bella agreed, somewhat warily. "Hey, will Edward be there?"

"Well, he's not on a hunting trip if that's what you mean. No one is. But, you know the rule with sleepovers, don't you?"

"Stay up as late as you can?"

"That too, but what I meant was: No boys allowed." Alice said seriously.

"And you got them to agree with that?" Bella asked skeptically.

"Of course not! They don't like that rule. But, they'll have to deal with it. Next time they can host their own slumber party. Well, bye!"

"Bye, Alice." Bella said and hung up. Oh yes, this would certainly be an interesting evening.

Meanwhile, in the Cullen's house, Alice hung up her line.

"Alice, are you sure it's only girls allowed?" Emmet asked.

"Most sure." Alice confirmed. Emmet went off to go sulk.

Now, Alice wondered, how to get Rosalie to be civil to Bella this evening. Ask her? Nah, that'd never work. Bribery? Maybe…


	2. Arrival

Author's Note: Hi! Sorry for the really short chapters, but they should get longer after this one! Hope you enjoy!

_The Slumber Party_

_Chapter 2 - Arrival_

The day passed slowly some times and quickly at others. Bella wasn't quite sure if she was looking forward to it or not. Who knew what Alice would dream up to do with the help of Rosalie.

Despite what Alice said, after Bella got Charlie's permission, she _did_ pack the sleepover basics.

Quarter to five, her duffel bag was packed. Bella slung it over her shoulder and headed to the door. Just before she reached it, the doorbell rang.

She shrugged, and answered it.

It was Edward.

"Hi Edward! What are you doing here? I was just coming over."

"Well, I figured I could pick you up, since it will probably be the only time I see you this evening." Edward replied glumly.

"Alice still keeping the 'girls only' rule?" Bella laughed as she got into Edward's car.

"Yep." Edward said.

Edwards turned on the car and started to pull out of the driveway. His cell phone then started ringing.

"Hello?" He said into it.

Bella could hear a quick talking voice on the other end.

"I had no intention of kidnapping Bella." Edward said dryly into the phone.

The voice started again. Alice was talking fast.

"We'll be there _soon_, Alice." Edward assured and then snapped the phone closed before the voice could start again.

"What was that all about?" Bella asked.

"Alice is under the impression that Emmet, Jasper or I have plans to wreck her 'sleepover'. _Which_ we do _not_." He said, trying to sound dignified.

"Hmm," was all Bella said.

Shortly (very shortly) after, they pulled into the Cullen's driveway.

Edward began getting out and tried to use his super speed to Bella's door before she could open it, but surprisingly, Alice arrived first.

"Bella! I'm so glad you got here ok!" Alice shifted an accusing eye to Edward. "I thought he might kidnap you or something. Come on! Let's get your stuff inside. Could you get her bag, Edward?"

"If I do, does that mean I get to hang around?"

"No. You get to hang out with Emmet or Jasper. You can have your own sleepover! Watch movies, talk, sulk, whatever!"

Edward sighed. He got the bag and went inside. Alice grinned at Bella and pulled her inside.


	3. Pizza, a movie, and a plot

**Author's Note: Sorry I haven't updated in so long! This story just needed some more brainstorming. Which reminds me… any ideas you have are welcome!**

**Note: No Emmett's were harmed in the making of this fic.**

_**The Sleepover!**_

_:cue thunder, lighting, and evil manic laughter in the background:_

_Chapter 3_

Alice pulled Bella inside the house talking rapidly.

"Bet you're wondering what we're going to do first, aren't you? Right? First we're going to have pizza and watch some movie that's on TV. Yep! And then we'll go from there. Be assured, we have plans though….haha! Oh no! You brought stuff? No fair! You were supposed to use the stuff I bought you. Hmm… let me see if I can get your stuff sent back to your house… Edward. He'll do it… plus it'll get him out of our hair for a few minutes while we're setting up. Edward? Oh, Edward! EDWARD! GET YOUR UNDEAD SELF OVER HERE NOW! I KNOW YOUR RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER EAVESDROPPING! Oh, very good. Would you please bring Bella's stuff back to her house then?"

Bella, who had been merely staring at Alice with wide eyes, snapped out of it. "No, that's ok. I'll use _some_ of the stuff you got me, 'kay?"

Alice shrugged.

"Where's Rosalie?" Bella asked curiously.

"In the garage, admiring her car," Alice said nonchalantly.

"Her convertible?"

"Uh, no."

"No?"

Alice opened the door to the garage, where Rosalie could be seen walking around a car that Bella had never seen there before. It was a :insert some really nice car here:

"When did she get that?" Bella asked.

"Oh, recently," Alice said quickly and hastily beckoned Bella inside, adding to Rosalie, "Rosalie, Bella's here!"

Rosalie looked up and… greeted Bella with a smile! What insanity was going on here!

Alice led the now very bewildered Bella back into the house.

They passed an incredulous looking Emmett on the way to the living room.

So fast that Bella couldn't hear (though she caught a shocked tone), Emmett said, "You bribed Rose with a car?"

Alice nodded at him.

"Bribe me!" Emmett pleaded at normal speech.

Bella gave Alice a questioning look, which Alice responded to by mouthing, "Emmett's crazy".

In the living room, the floor was clear. Off to the side was the table that had been pushed out of the way, three sleeping bags, a huge pile of pillows, and other various items that made Bella worry/wonder.

"We're going to have sooo much fun," Alice said gleefully from behind Bella. Yep, Bella was worried now.

The doorbell rang.

"Who comes to your house besides me?" Bella asked.

"PIZZA!" Alice yelled and dashed to get money and opened the door, "Here's the money, thanks for the pizza, have a nice evening, bye!" Alice chanted at the stunned guy very fast.

"Uh, yeah," said the guy, handing her the pizza. The guy had unnatural bright red hair in a Mohawk.

Alice shut the door, "Time for pizza and a movie!"

Alice zoomed around the room setting up two dinner tray table things, placing the pizza on one and a plate on the other.

"Help yourself, Bella, it's all yours!"

Rosalie came into the room. " 'sup, Bella."

"Uh, nothing. You?" Bella asked somewhat nervously.

"Ditto. What're we watching then?" Rosalie asked.

"I rented Underworld!" Alice said happily. "That ok with you two?"

"Uh, you guys don't mind watching a movie about fakey vampires?"

"Of course not!" Alice objected.

"They make for good comedies," Rosalie snickered.

Bella shrugged, "Ok then, fine with me."

(A/N: I would just like to say, that I myself have only seen the beginning of Underworld, so if I get anything wrong, sorry!)

True to what Rosalie said, after only a few minutes into the movie, Alice and Rosalie were laughing happily.

Their laughter did not dull the horror for Bella, however.

30 minutes into the movie…

"Bella? Are you hiding behind that pizza slice?" Alice sounded concerned.

"Meep! But it won't block the sound!"

"Oh, I see." Alice said.

"Why don't we watch something else instead?" Alice and Bella were shocked to hear this suggestion was Rosalie's.

So, then, they turned on Superman Returns (cause I saw it recently, that's why).

Bella finished her pizza (well, only part of it. Alice said "the rest can be for a midnight snack, unless of course, you want me to try my cooking skills out!"

After the movie ended, they talked. What about? The movie (don't worry, no spoilers if you haven't seen the movie)

Point 1: Why superman?

Point 2: Why no super girl?

Point 3: How could they make themselves fly like Superman does…

While discussing point 3, Alice picked up a paper and said, "Here, let me show you how I think we could set up the cable."

Then she held the paper so only Bella could see.

And she wrote not a diagram, but this:

_Bella!_

_Don't look now, but Emmett's spying on us through one of the vents in the ceiling!_

Bella took the paper from Alice and wrote:

_So, what are we going to do about it? We have a plan of strategy, right?_

Alice grinned happily and wrote six words, before picking up the conversation:

_Already done_

_Visions rule_

_Goodbye screws_

Right on cue after Bella looked up they heard the sound of a grate clattering to the floor, followed by a scramble as Emmett tumbled out after it, trying to get back in his tunnel, but failed and fell after the grate. Luckily his reflexes caught up and he landed okay, though embarrassed.

Instantly, Rosalie and Alice raced over before he could right himself. Mysteriously, Esme also appeared to restrain him, as though it had been planned. Hmm…

"Tell us your secret plans for the night!" Esme demanded, taking on a tough, police like tone. "How are you going to crash the party!"

"I'm not! I'm not!" Emmet wailed.

"We know you are!" All four girls chanted.

"I won't tell anything! Edward! Jasper! HELP ME!"

"Oh, there're busy at the moment. Helping Carlisle." Esme laughed evilly, really getting into her role in the scheme.

Emmet whimpered, than whispered, "What are you going to do to me?"

Alice grinned and they brought him up to Alice's room, where they tied him to a waiting chair.

"Huh? Why am I here?" Emmet questioned, thinking of all the fun methods they might try to get him to talk. But he never would! AHhahaha! They would never break him! This was sooo fun… like a TV show.

Then Alice emerged from her bathroom, a make-up bag in hand.

If Emmet could have fainted, he would then.

**Author's Note: Hope you liked it! It's a longer chapter than the others :D **


	4. Emmet's Makeover

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight…**

_**The Slumber Party**_

"_Then Alice emerged from her bathroom, a make-up bag in hand._

_If Emmet could have fainted, he would then."_

"You are kidding! You are kidding!" Emmet wailed (2nd time tonight for anyone counting)

"Heheh, you wish," Rosalie said.

"Rosalie! You… BETRAY ME?"

"Normally, no. But this is just good sleepover fun, Emmet. Chill," She grinned at Emmet.

"Besides," Alice continued, "You were trying to wreak our slumber party, weren't you?" She was smiling dangerously. Emmet was scared. Very, _very_ scared. "Never try sneak up on someone who can see the future Emmet. Just a tip."

"Look at the bright side," Esme added cheerfully with an undertone of evil scariness, "Now you're part of the festivities."

"JAAAAASPEEEER! CAAAARLIIIIIIISLE! EEEEEEDWAAAARD!" Emmet tried as a last resort.

_Zip! Zip! Zip!_

Three people appeared in the door way, looking fairly curious.

"Oh, hello, Esme," Carlisle greeted cheerfully, "How's the party going?"

"Just grand!" She assured him.

Carlisle saw Emmet and frowned. "When was he invited and I wasn't?"

"Maybe you don't see the chains BINDING ME TO THE CHAIR!" Emmet yelled.

Without even looking away from the doorway, Alice and Bella said in the same toneless voice in unison, "Gag him."

Edward looked shocked at Bella.

Bella grinned and waved at him.

"Um, having fun, Bella?" He asked cautiously.

"Tons!"

Rosalie grinned wickedly. "We have more chairs if you three would like to join Emmet."

_Zip! Zip! Zip!_

"GONE! ALL GONE! Won't anyone help save poor little ol' me!" Emmet yelled after them

Edward, Carlisle and Jasper's head peeked in the doorway.

Emmet beamed, "In knew you wouldn't abandon me!"

Jasper grinned, "Actually no. I don't want to end up like you will. I just wanted to point out that you're not poor. You're pretty rich really."

"And I wanted to add that you aren't exactly 'little' either," Edward chimed in.

Emmet scowling at the threesome said, "And I suppose that you, Carlisle, wanted to point out that I'm not actually me."

Carlisle looked startled, "Why, no, of course not. That wouldn't make sense at all. I just wanted to see if they'd stared beautifying you yet. I see they haven't."

And with three more zips, they were gone.

Emmet hung his head.

"Now now. We can't do your makeup if you're head is down." Alice chided.

"Yay?" Emmet ventured.

"Nay," Alice corrected, as Rosalie lifted his head up.

Meanwhile downstairs

For those of you who've heard about times in the 1920's (correct me if I'm wrong, which I probably am) for entertainment, families would gather around their family radio and listen to whatever program happened to be on.

Well, in the Cullen's living room, a similar sight could be seen.

Except for the part that only Carlisle and Jasper were listening.

And Edward was the radio.

"What's happening now?" Carlisle demanded of Edward in a very un-Carlisle way.

"Ack, All I hear in Emmet's mind is a bunch of screaming. And oh… you don't want to hear what he's thinking now. Apparently he has a lot of things to say to us later…"

"Yikes," Jasper commented. "I think I might be gone later."

"Good plan," Carlisle agreed, already looking at the coat rack. (if they have one)

"Um, not according to Emmet," Edward interrupted, "After he's done err… telling us what he thinks of 'the major abandonment', he's going to make us help with his schemes. OH! He has a big plan for you Jasper! Glad it's not me…" Edward shuddered.

"What is it?" Jasper demanded.

"Whoah. Dude, that's scary. I just saw what Emmet looks like from Alice's thoughts. I think they're done. I _hope _for Emmet's sake their done. Uh oh. They are _not_ done. If ever you guys hope to save Emmet it's NOW! Oops, too late. I hope that isn't permanent."

"WHAT?" Carlisle and Emmet shouted in unison.

"You'll see," Edward said.

"Cryptic doesn't work for you, Eddie," Jasper said dryly, then "EEP!" As a blur hurled toward him.

"EDWARD! DOWN!" Carlisle shouted.

He managed to pull Edward away.

"Never. NEVER! Call me 'Eddie'," Edward hissed.

"Or what?" Jasper shot back cheekily.

"Or…" Edward grinned slyly, "I'll call you… JAS_MINE_!"

"ACK, NO!" Jasper wailed.

"Ack, yes!"

"Ack No!

"Ack-"

"Enough!"

"Fine. You don't have to be such a spoiled sport, Carlisle."

"Excuse me! Who pays for your collage tutition!"

"Uh, I do."

"Oh. Sorry about that."

"Who's up for Thunder Ball?"

"No thunder."

"Bummer."

"Totally."

"EMMET'S COMING!"

"HOORAY!" Three voices shouted.

"Sob," Said a voice from upstairs.

Then, quite dramatically I might add, a red carpet rolled down the stairs.

And down came Emmet.

No makeup had been spared.

His face was paler than usual, though due to makeup or emotion was untellable.

But that wasn't what had everyone shocked and staring. It was… HIS HAIR!

Bright, Bubble Gum Pink, and shaped into a Mohawk.

"What do you think?" Bella asked cheerfully, following Emmet along with Esme, Rosalie, and Alice.

"Very… uh… interesting!" Carlisle snapped to attention first. The other two joined him.

"Very interesting!"

"Most interesting I've ever seen!"

The girls beamed.

They were unable to stare at Emmet any longer however, for he dashed off before anyone could stop him.

They shrugged. "Maybe he won't try to wreak our sleepover anymore." Rosalie said.

Edward, Jasper and Carlisle: Shifty Eyes

"What's with the shifty eyes?" Bella asked.

"Shifty eyes? What shifty eyes?" Carlisle asked.

"Your eyes. They were shifty."

"They were? Oh my. All involuntary?"

"Oh nevermind."

"Okay!"

Emmet came dashing back into the room, his normal self, though somehow he'd managed to keep on the right makeup to make him look like a classic Dracula.

Except for the Mohawk part, but he didn't seem to mind it so much, only say, "I wish it weren't pink. But the Mohawk part of it is way awesome, dude!"

"Now what are you guys going to do?" Bella asked.

"Maybe, go see a movie?" Esme asked, but it was actually more of a demand.

"Yep!" The guys said quickly and left.

"Now what?" Esme asked.

"Prank calls," Rosalie said.

"Prank calls?" Bella repeated.

"Esme can throw her voice," Alice added, "it's amazing."

Author's Note: CLIFF HANGER! Sort of anyway. As much as this story will get. Hope you enjoyed (and that I'm not being too mean to Emmet)!

Oh and by the way. If you read this Stephanie Meyer, no disrespect is intended toward your characters.


	5. Prank Calls Part 1

**_Author's Note: Thanks for all the reviews! I'd especially like to thank all the reviewers and the people who came up with ideas for this chapter. And, of course, thank you LunaTears, my Beta Reader._**

Chapter – Prank Calls : Part 1

"_Prank calls?" Bella repeated._

_"Esme can throw her voice," Alice added, "it's amazing."_

"I bet she can…," Bella said, almost scared.

"It'll be fun, Bella," Rosalie put in.

"I know who we can start with!" Alice chirped. She picked up the phone and began to dial.

Rosalie punched the speaker button on the phone.

After only one ring, someone answered.

"Hello?" Said the voice on the other end.

Bella, taken by surprise, blurted out, "Edward!"

There was a pause while Alice and Esme exchanged dismayed faces at each other and Rosalie clapped her hand to her forehead.

"Bella? Is that you?" Edward asked.

Rosalie hit the end button.

In the Volvo

"I don't believe it!" Edward said as he snapped his cell phone shut. "She hung up on me!" He sounded incredulous.

"Bella hung up on you?" Carlisle stated, confused.

"Whoah, man, that's deep," Emmet put in seriously. Carlisle, Jasper and Edward turned their heads and stared at Emmet disbelievingly.

"What!" Emmet said.

The other shook their heads and continued enjoying the drive. They were going very fast, since Edward had called dibs on driving.

A ring tone filled the still air again.

"Not mine," Edward said.

"It's mine," Jasper said, opening his cell phone. "Hello?"

"Greetings, would this be Jasper Cullen Hale? Resident of Forks, Washington?" Said a voice on the other end.

"Uh, yeah, it would be," Jasper confirmed, sending the other confused looks. The others listened intently, since because of their inhuman hearing, they heard both sides.

"Wonderful!" The caller rejoiced. "In that case, we are please to inform you, that you have been accepted in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry!"

There was a long silence in the car, broken only when Emmet heaved a great sob and said, "How could you not tell us something like this? You're a witch!"

"Wizard," Edward corrected automatically.

"You knew too!" Emmet wailed.

"Um, hello?" The phone voice prompted.

"What are you talking about?" Jasper asked the phone.

"You've. Been. Accepted." The voice repeated slowly.

"Anyone know what this person's talking about?" Jasper asked the car.

"Hogwarts," Emmet sobbed, "You know, the book? About the kids with magic? When the witches or wizards turn 11, they go to Hogwarts to learn magic. I never knew it was based on a true story!" Emmet finished blissfully, then, his happy expression dropped and he added, "Why didn't I get a letter!"

Jasper shook his head, digesting what Emmet had told him. A loop hole occurred to him. "uh, sorry, man, but as much as I'd like to attend and all, I'm way past 11. Like around 20, dude."

"Hmmm…." The voice considered this new development, "Well… it might be hard to arrange, but I'm sure we could work it out. Would you mind terribly learning in a classroom with 11 year olds?"

Jasper was getting frustrated. "Who are you anyways!"

"Dumbledor, headmaster of Hogwarts," The voice said matter-o-factly.

Emmet let out a shriek. "LET ME TALK TO HIM! PLEASE, JASPER, PLEASE!"

"Sorry, Dumbledor, dude, can't make it. Someone wants to talk to you though," Jasper tossed the phone to Emmet, who squealed in a most un-Emmet like fashion.

"DUMBLDOR! I'M YOUR #1 BIGGEST FAN! SAY SOMETHING!" Emmet waited. "Uh, Dumbledor?" After a minute, he slammed the phone closed, "He hung up on me!" Emmet shouted, enraged. "And I was going to find out his address so I could send him chocolate frogs, too."

Jasper didn't even bother asking.

At the Cullen's house

Bella, Rosalie, Alice, and Esme were currently laughing. A lot.

When they finally got it under control, Bella managed to ask, "Emmet's a HP fan?"

"Yep, we read the whole series one night," Rosalie informed her.

"Cool," Bella replied, "There's this really cool web-site for it I should show you two-"

"Back to business!" Rosalie commanded, "By the way, Esme, perfect imitation of the guy who played Dumbledor in the movie."

"Thank you, Rosalie. Though it pains me to prank poor Jasper."

"Will you help us prank call the others, Esme?" Alice asked.

"Sure!" Esme quipped.

"Terrific," Rosalie said.

Back at the Volvo

"Let's do a scavenger hunt!" Emmet suggested. The guys were trying to think of something to fill the time until the movie they wanted to see started/

"Emmet, to do a scavenger hunt, you have to have it prepared," Jasper admonished.

"I know! I set one up ages ago; just in case we happened to find ourselves bored," Emmet said happily.

"Cause being bored would be the end of the world," Jasper said dryly.

Emmet nodded seriously, "I'm glad you've caught on." Then, more brightly, he asked, "So? How about it?"

"Sure," Carlisle agreed, "I'll be referee."

"Fine with me," Edward agreed.

Jasper sighed. "Okay."

"Great! Over to the woods. Here are the things you need to find," Emmet pulled several lists out of his pocket, then handed them out. "You can go anywhere in town to get them. There are bicycles at my secret location in the woods that will provide transportation. Got it?"

Stunned, they nodded.

"I'll wait will the car," Carlisle said, and Edward beamed, glad he wouldn't have to leave the car alone in the woods.

"You can read a book while you wait," Emmet said, pulling a copy of the first Harry Potter book out of one of the car's compartments.

"Did I know you had that there?" Edward asked Emmet.

"No," Emmet explained, "I find it handy to keep copies of this book in certain places."

"Like where?" Jasper asked warily.

Emmet shrugged. "Oh look! We're here!"

They all jumped out of the car.

Emmet ran off into the woods and came back with three bikes, giving Edward and Jasper one.

"Carlisle, if you would be so kind," Emmet said.

"Ready, set, GO!" Carlisle shouted, and they were off. Well, Emmet was off. Jasper and Edward were staring nonplussed at their lists.

"These aren't scavenger hunt lists!" Jasper complained.

"GO! Or Emmet will win," Carlisle repeated, and this time, they need no more urging.

…………………………………………………

Edward was cruising along a road on his bike down a road, when his cell phone rang.

"Hello?" He spoke into it, very politely.

"Oh! This is Tyler. That you, Edward?" Asked the voice.

"Yes, this is he," Edward confirmed.

"Huh. I thought this was Bella's number." 'Tyler' said, sounding puzzled. "I was calling to say Hello. Guess I'll just go over to your house and say hi."

At the Cullen's House

"He hung up on me!" Esme said, indignant, "I thought I'd taught him better manners than that."

"Um, Esme, You know why he hung up?" Bella asked warily.

Esme stared at Bella, so dismayed at Edward apparently poor manners, she didn't come up with the conclusion until Bella answered her own question.

"It because he's on his way here."


	6. Results of a Prank

**_Results of a Prank_**

_**Part 2**_

_Esme stared at Bella, so dismayed at Edward's apparently poor manners, she didn't come up with the conclusion until Bella answered her own question._

_"It because he's on his way here."_

The four girls gulped in unison. Then there was a flurry of action as they prepared for Edward's arrival. They didn't have to wait long…

The door at the entrance flew off its hinges and thrown outside. When the dust settled, it revealed, Edward, framed in the doorway in the most dramatic way.

Esme blinked as Edward snarled a snarl that made _Rosalie _flinch. The second time he snarled, it resembled the word "Tyler".

Esme's expression immediately turned stern. "Edward Anthony Masen Cullen!"

Edward's fierce expression instantly vanished and he almost looked scared, but only for a minute. Then his face retained the scary expression. "Where's Tyler!" He growled.

Esme, Bella, Alice, and Rosalie all stood in a line facing the door, unblinkingly watching him.

"Edward," Esme started again, her tone flat, "The door was not locked, you know."

Edward blinked.

"Secondly," Esme continued, "I thought you had better manners!"

"Oops?" Edward ventured.

Rosalie slapped her hand to her forehead as Esme stalked off towards the kitchen, muttering something that sounded like, "All manners learned. Gone! In only two seconds!"

They waited in silence as they heard a suspicious crash from the kitchen, then Esme rejoined the still silent group.

"Well? Why have you crashed our party? Literally." Esme nodded towards the door.

Edward looked sheepish for a moment, than repeated, "Where is Tyler?"

Right on cue, Alice reached behind her and held out a little puppy dog for him to see.

"Who? This Tyler?" Alice asked Edward, while the dog stared blankly at him.

Edward looked baffled, "Uh, no." He hesitated, "Since when do we have a dog?"

"Since… now!" Rosalie told him.

Edward considered this. "Hmm… Why call him Tyler though?"

"EDWARD!" Alice fumed, "Don't you DARE call Tyler a 'him'. Tyler's a girl. What are you trying to do; wreck her self esteem?"

"Uh, no."

"Then apologize," Bella suggested.

"To a _dog_?" Edward looked wonderingly from Bella to the dog… ahem. I mean From Bella to Tyler.

"Yes, to the dog."

"I don't think that's really necessary," Edward said.

Esme fixed him with a stern look, "It's the least you could do after breaking down the door."

"I'm sorry! Will you let it go now, Esme?" Edward pleaded.

Esme glared.

"Fine," Edward said in a grumpy tone, "I'm sorry. T…Ty… T…Tyl…"

"You can do it, Edward," Bella encouraged.

Edward took a deep breath, and then said at hyper speed, "I'm sorry Tyler!"

Bella blinked and looked at Alice. "Did he apologize? He was going to fast for me to hear."

Alice nodded at her.

"Fix the door and go, Edward," Rosalie ordered, "I'm sure the guys are waiting for you somewhere."

"Er… yeah. Ok," Edward said hastily and left.

The girls watched as he repaired the door then ran off into the darkness.

"Well, I'm glad that's over," Rosalie said after a minute, breaking the silence.

Alice froze.

"What is it, Alice?" Esme asked concernedly, "A vision?"

Alice nodded, her gaze fixed on a point faraway.

After a silent moment, she gasped. "It's not over! We have to save Tyler!"

Authors' Note:

End of Chapter

Cliff Hanger!

Hope you enjoyed this chapter.

Haha. Just kidding; I wouldn't be so mean…

Wordlessly, Esme picked up Bella and started running to Tyler's house, Rosalie and Alice following close behind.

They made it there fast, Bella a bit shaky, since she forgot to close her eyes.

"Are you alright, Bella?" Alice asked.

"Yep!" Bella assured her, though she leaned on Esme for support.

"Well, this is a good sign," Esme said while they walked normally up the sidewalk to Tyler's house. "The door hasn't been ripped off."

They approached and knocked on the door.

Tyler answered.

"Hey Bella! What're you doing here? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine," Bella said, waving him away. "Where's Edward?"

"Edward?" Tyler repeated, "Edward Cullen? Why would I know where he is?"

"Right… Alice?"

"Uh… practical joke!" Alice told him.

"Right…" Tyler said, sounding very confused.

"Yah… haha! You know, a joke? Something people do for fun? J-o-k-e?" Esme informed him.

Tyler stared at Esme, then said incredulously, "Mrs. Cullen!"

"Hi," Esme said.

Suddenly, so quickly it took all by surprise, something leaped off the roof and landed directly in front of Tyler.

"Edward!" Bella greeted.

Tyler fainted.

"Oops," Edward said bluntly.

Rosalie clapped her hand to her forehead.

"You're going to dent your forehead if you keep that up, Rose," Alice chided.

"What are we going to do about Tyler?" Bella asked.

"Hmm…" Esme thought, "I don't know what he'll remember. Do you think he actually saw Edward? Or just heard Bella yell his name?"

"Why?" Alice said, grinning, "What's you're idea, Esme?"

Five minutes later

"Oh, look! He's reviving!" Bella called.

Everyone snapped up from their waiting positions, minus, Edward, who was hiding.

"What… happened?" Tyler asked.

"Don't you remember?" Alice prodded, checking how much he remembered.

"Oh yeah!" Tyler said, "Edward jumped of the roof!"

Good thing they anticipated this. The girls burst out in practiced laughter.

"Tlyer," Rosalie explained, "It wasn't the Edward, it was this CPR dummy!"

Tyler blinked at the mannequin lying on the porch, with the word Edward written across its forehead.

"How did that get here?" He asked.

"We think it must have fallen out of a helicopter." Alice continued.

"Right…" Tyler said, "You know, I think I left the popcorn in the microwave." He said. "See you at school, Bella!" With that said, Tyler dashed back inside the house.

"Well, not really believable, but it worked," Alice cheered.

"How come you didn't get here before us, Edward?" Bella asked.

"Well," Edward began explaining after he'd jumped back down from the roof, "I was going to go to Tyler's –the person, not the puppy- and then I decided I was over reacting. Besides, I had something I had to do-"

"AND YOU'RE LOSING!" someone cackled from the road. They turned and made out the outline of Emmet whizzing down the road on his bicycle, a bag slung over his shoulder.

"Oh shoot!" Edward cursed. He sped up his explanation, "Then-I-saw-you-four-heading-over-here-so-I-thought-I'd-see-what-happened-and-Bella-didn't-look-to-good-so-I-jumped-down-to-help-her-but-now-I-got-to-go-so-I'll-talk-to-you-all-later-see-you-Bella!" And then he disappeared into the night.

The four girls stared after him.

"That," Rosalie stated, "Was too weird."

The others nodded silently in agreement.

After a moment, Alice said, "More prank calls then?"

And they hurried to run back to the Cullen's house, to try safer prank calls.


	7. Prank Calls Part 2

Prank Calls: Part 2

Everything was going just peachy.

Edward was back on task,

Emmet and Jasper were worrying about Edward's speedy recovery,

Rosalie, Bella, and Alice were plotting their next call,

Esme was testing out some recipes for Bella,

And, last, but certainly not least,

Carlisle was busy fighting off rabid squirrels to protect Edward's car.

Oh, yes. The night was off to a great start.

"These cookies are great, Esme!" Bella yelled into the kitchen.

"Why, thank you, Bella! I'll have this cake done in a half hour. Think you can wait that long?" Esme asked from the kitchen.

"I'll have to try to survive 'til then," Bella said dramatically.

"Thanks for being nice to Esme about this," Alice said, "She's been dying –excuse the pun- to try these recipes out for ages."

"How does she do it without being able to eat it herself?" Bella questioned.

"It's just one of those unexplained things," Rosalie supplied, "Kinda like Carlisle's fear of squirrels."

"Let's call someone now!" Alice commanded.

"'kay," Bella agreed.

"Emmet!" Alice suggested enthusiastically.

Rosalie looked hesitant, "Nothing too mean?"

"Of course not," Alice assured her in a 'innocent' tone.

Rosalie looked skeptical, "Let's do Jasper first."

Alice shrugged. "I'm game!"

And they set about their plans. Then, they called.

Jasper: Hello?

Esme: Forks Pizza, how may I help you?

Jasper: You called me…

Esme: Uh, no.

Jasper: Yes, you did

Esme: did not

Jasper: did too

Esme: did not

Jasper: did too- wait, this is stupid. I'm getting da ja voo! Oh, wait, that could be because I'm always having an argument almost identical to this with Emmet… except Emmet's not a pizza guy… but that's beside the point!

Esme: ok…. Did not!

Jasper: DID TOO!

Esme:pause: Whoah, man, you don't have to get all grumpy 'bout it. Can I recommend a class that will help with your anger?

Jasper:hangs up:

"Well, that was fun," Esme said, "I haven't been in such a immature argument since I was a human! But apparently Emmet and Jasper have… I'll have to have a work with them. Honestly, first Edward turns out to be rude-"

Bella shook her head at this.

"And now Jasper and Emmet too! Where did I go wrong?" Esme asked.

After a short silence, Alice announced, "Emmet's turn!"

"I have an idea…," Bella ventured.

"Do tell!" Rosalie commanded.

At the… erm…well… At Main Street? …no, he's past there already… well, uh… Ahem:

At Emmet's Bike

"MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Emmet's looked down, pleased to see his new phone ringer he'd installed yesterday worked.

The manic laughter paused for a moment, then 'rang' again.

"MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Emmet added a "mwhaha" of his own at his ingeniousness before picking up his cell phone.

"Hello! Emmet speaking," He chirped into the cell phone.

"Oh good," A nasal voice informed him, "please hold for a minute."

"Wait! You called _me_! Not the other way around. You can't tell me to hold!" Emmet insisted.

"Dear sir, I'm very sorry, but if you hadn't have answered, it would have been a dramatic waste of Miss Carlotta's time."

"Miss Carlotta?" Emmet repeated.

"Only the biggest name in records!"

Before Emmet could inquire further, classical music played into the phone.

The wait grew long and Emmet grew bored, seeing as he had stopped biking to take the call. He stepped away from the bike and started practicing some steps he's learned from a ballroom dancing class Rosalie had made him take (but that's another story; mwhaha!)

"Mommy, what's that man doing?" A little kid's voice enquired.

Emmet glanced at the kid walking with his mom down the darkened street. He wondered if they need a ride. It seemed awfully late to be walking.

"Hush now," The mom scolded the child, "He probably got separated from that carnival that came to town."

They could walk for all Emmet cared. But then again, what would _you_ think if you saw a man dancing by himself on a dark road, with a cell phone clutched to his ear.

"Excuse, Mr. Emmet, are you still there?" The familiar nasal voice asked.

"Uh, yeah, dude. I've been err… sitting here waiting for like, EVER!"

"So sorry about that," The voice said back, sounding not very apologetic, "You're on with Miss Carlotta now."

"Err… ok. Hello? Miss Carlotta?" Emmet asked into the phone, wondering what was going on.

"Emmet Cullen! May I call you Emmet?" Gushed a dramatic sounding voice on the other end who could only be Miss Carlotta (coughALICEcough!)

"Uh, ok."

"Charming! I'm so glad I could get a hold of you!"

"Actually, _you_ didn't. Mr. Nasal voice did," Emmet told her, but she paid him no heed.

"I'm surprised you're not swamped with calls, darling! I heard you have an amazing voice!"

"I do?"

"Of COURSE you do! Want to be a star, Emmet? Do you?"

"Sure!"

"Ok, all you have to do is sing a song into the phone so I can have a sample, 'kay? Preferably a children's Christmas song."

"Ok… I only know one though." Emmet admitted.

"And I'm sure it's a wonderful one," Miss Carlotta assured him.

"Well, it's actually pretty embarrassing."

"Don't be modest!" Miss Carlotta was beginning to sound impatient.

"Well… ok. Here goes." Emmet took a deep breath, then began to sing.

"_Rudolph the red nose reindeer,_

_had a very shiny nose!_

_And if you ever saw him,_

_You could even say it glows!"_

Suddenly, Emmet, stopped, interrupted by a familiar muffled voice on the other end.

"_Bella? How's that cake taste? Ok?"_

Emmet nearly dropped his phone.

"ESME? BELLA?" He bellowed into it instead.

There was a long pause on the other than, then a hesitant, "No?"

"Ah!" Emmet yelled.

There was another pause then he could hear Alice whisper, "Quick, let's upload this recording onto the internet before Emmet gets home."

And then the line went dead.

Later At The Cullen's House

After a confrontation with Emmet (of whom they had assured that they hadn't really uploaded anything onto the internet) the girls weren't sure what they should do.

"Emmet will have told the other guys we were pranking them by now," Rosalie complained.

"So what now?" Bella asked.

"I dunno," Alice sighed. She hadn't wanted the prank calls to be over yet! They still hadn't done Carlisle yet. But then, the phone (still on speaker) rang:

Alice: Hello?

Voice:sounding panicky: It's Carlisle! Alice! Is that you?

Esme: We're all here, Carlisle

Carlisle: Thank goodness, I need you all to get over here FAST!

Rosalie: Why? We're having a slumber party.

Carlisle: RABID SQUIRRELS! They want Edward's car, I think! He'll kill me if they get it!

Esme: I know you don't like squirrels, Carlisle, but aren't you being a tad extreme?

Carlisle:definitely sounding scared now: if anything's extreme, IT'S THESE SQUIRRELS! Their eyes are RED! I swear!

Rosalie: Oh, I get it; this is a revenge prank call.

Alice: Haha! Good one, Carlisle!

Bella: yeah! Really original!

Carlisle: No, I serious:pause:in an awed, terrified voice: OH. MY. GOSH- AHHH!

And then the phone went dead.

"Wow," Alice broke the silence that followed, "Carlisle's better at jokes than I thought."

IN THE WOODS AT EDWARD'S CAR

"Back! Back you blood thirsty fiends!" Carlisle hissed away from the receiver at the hoard of squirrels gathered in a semi-circle around him. The car was at his back. "No, I'm serious!" He said into the phone.

Carlisle kicked at one of the squirrels, but it clung to his shoe. "OH. MY. GOSH- AHH!" At this point he accidentally dropped the phone, "The squirrels eating my shoe!"

Carlisle shook his shoe violently until the squirrel went flying, were it hit a tree, but recovered instantly, crawling down to join the others.

Carlisle looked down to locate his phone just in time to see a squirrel swallow it.

"Carlisle!" A voice shouted as Emmet stepped into the clearing.

At the noise, all the squirrels' heads snapped around to look at Emmet.

"Carlisle…," Emmet began, "Why are there a hundred squirrels staring at me?"

"I. Don't. Know."

Suddenly, another hundred squirrels leaped out of the trees and surrounded Emmet.

"Emmet, these aren't normal squirrels," Carlisle said, slowly regaining his take charge attitude (of which Emmet was grateful of, for Emmet had as of yet unconfirmed suspicion about these familiar looking squirrels.)

The Squirrels confirmed Emmet's theory by ripping a rock half as big as Emmet out of the ground and threw it into the woods.

"That! Was Not! NORMAL!" Jasper gasped, entering the clearing with a bag slung over his shoulder. He too, was instantly surrounded by squirrels.

"Hey guys, what's-"

"Edward! Go away! Get Help!" Emmet pleaded, but it was too late. Edward was surrounded too.

"What's the problem?" Edward asked. "They're just squirrels. Cute squirrels too."

"NOOO!" Emmet shouted as Edward lowered his hand to one.

The squirrel bit Edward's hand, shocking Edward when he realized it hurt.

"Emmet!" Carlisle shouted the four began to fight back the approaching squirrels, "What have you done?"

"Why would you suspect me?" Emmet said, in a fake innocent tone that quivered with fear.

"Because," Carlisle said, "You're the one usually behind things like this."

"Well," Emmet started to explain, "I was bored one day-"

The other three groaned.

"Let me tell my story!" Emmet said, and waited until they quieted before continuing. "Anyway, on this day I was bored, I caught a squirrel- and tried to turn it into a vampire." He finished quickly.

"YOU WHAT!" Jasper, Carlisle, and Edward shouted at the same time.

"Wow, you three should put on an act together," Emmet said nervously.

"And did it work?" Edward said through gritted teeth.

"Well…" Emmet said hesitantly, "I never knew for sure, because the third day, when I went up in my room to check on him, the cage had been broken out of."

"The door came open?" Carlisle asked.

"Err… no. The bars had been eaten away."

"We're going to die!" Jasper said dramatically, "Death by squirrels! How tragic!"

"I haven't finished writing my will!" Emmet protested.

"I never got to say goodbye to Bella." Edward said sadly.

"And I never got to say goodbye to Alice."

"And I never got to say goodbye to Esme."

"And I never got to say goodbye to Rose- Nutty!"

Carlisle, Edward and Jasper's head shot up at this last statement and looked at Emmet, who had apparently lost it.

"Ros_alie_, Emmet, not Rose_nutty_!" Jasper corrected.

"No! Nutty!" Emmet said, bending down and letting a squirrel crawl onto his hand. He held the squirrel up to his face and said, "Is that you, boy?"

The squirrel chattered something.

"It IS him!" Emmet said happily, hugging the squirrel. "This," Emmet added proudly, "is the first Vampire Squirrel in Forks."

The squirrel chattered again.

"He says that he started his own coven," Emmet told the shocked others.

"I don't want to know how he learned squirrel," Carlisle whispered.

"Ask him if this is all of them!" Jasper asked, sounding scared of the answer.

The squirrel said something else and Emmet translated, "No," he said nonchalantly, "There a couple thousand more. He said he'll call them off."

Edward and Jasper goggled. Carlisle scurried into the car. Jasper and Edward followed the example.

"Get into the car, Emmet!" Carlisle yelled.

"Uh, could I hang with the squirrels for a while? Nutty and I haven't talked in ages!"

For answer, Edward pulled the car out of the woods and drove home. Fast.


	8. Beware the Squirrel

**Author's Note: I hope you all like squirrels, because they're still invading this fanfic! Next chapter will get back to the main plot thing again. Enjoy!**

**P.S. Visual is the key here. Try to picture what's happening to enhance the funny factor.**

**This is dedicated to all reviewers and those people whom, like magpies and rabid vampire squirrels, have an attraction to shiny things**

_Beware the Nutty squirrel_

"We're home!" Jasper called as the guys entered the house.

"Yes. Home. Safe home," muttered Carlisle shakily.

"Are you three all right?" Alice asked.

"Why would you think anything is wrong, Alice?" Edward asked nonplussed.

"Have you seen yourselves recently?"

Jasper, Carlisle and Edward looked down at themselves, only then realizing the casualties of the squirrel attack. The clothes were shredded.

Silently, the guys went to go change. When they came down, there was a hubbub of questions.

"What happened?"

"Were you attacked?"

"Was it other vampires?"

"No it wasn't, or they'd look worse!"

"Hey! None of this 'worse' business; we don't look bad at all!"

"WHERE IS EMMETT?"

This last question, said in a deadly voice caused all to freeze and turn to look at the dead serious Rosalie.

"Tell. Me. Now." She commanded.

"It's a funny story actually-" Carlisle started, but Rosalie interrupted.

"Say it! No prelude!"

"Calm down now, Rose" Carlisle admonished, then continued, reeling off the night's events in a nonchalant way, "We were attacked by vampire squirrels, but Emmet knew one and we were saved, but in the end Emmet decided to stay with them."

"Stay with them!" Rosalie shrieked, "Like forever?"

"I'm sure that's not the case," Esme said calmly.

Jasper sent waves of calm at her, but quickly with drew when Rosalie turned and snarled a snarl at him that made the others quake, even though it wasn't aimed at them (for which Bella was extremely grateful for).

Suddenly the front door burst open.

"Hello all!" Boomed Emmet.

Rosalie rushed over to give him a hug, but Emmet stopped her.

"Careful! Don't squish Nutty," Emmet told her.

"Nutty," Rosalie repeated.

Emmet beamed and held up the squirrel. Edward, Jasper and Carlisle's eyes opened wide with horror and disbelief.

"You brought that… that… _monster_ back here!" Jasper shouted outraged.

Emmet looked hurt. Creepily enough, the squirrel looked hurt to…

"Don't call him a monster! He has feelings to you know," Emmet reprimanded Jasper.

"He's too small for feelings!" Edward shot back.

Emmet drew a huge gasp.

"Calm down, everyone," Esme broke into the chaos that was starting up, "Let's start over."

"Good," Emmet said, "I would like to introduce to all to my good friend Nutty. Nutty, this is Alice, Rosalie, Esme, Carlisle and Bella. You already know those two uncouth vamps over there; Jasper and Edward."

"I'm not uncouth!"

"Quiet Jasper! Nutty, go say hi," Emmet instructed, turning the squirrel loose on the ground.

The squirrel walked up to Rosalie and stuck out its paw.

"Isn't he the smartest?" Emmet said proudly, "He shakes hands… or paws."

Rosalie apparently didn't think so. She merely poked the affronted looking squirrel with her toe.

"Manners Rosalie!" Emmet chided, but he said no more on that subject after she sent him a glare.

Nutty then proceeded to 'shake hands' with everyone else; who all did so hesitantly, not wanting to see his squirrelly wrath.

"He's not staying," Rosalie said bluntly when the introductions were over.

"Of course he will," Emmet said, "he's a guest!"

"I have to agree with Rosalie here," Esme put in, "I do not want a rodent in my house, no matter how mannered."

"But I _want_ him to stay!" Emmet wailed.

"Uh Emmet," Bella caught his attention, "Would you still want said squirrel to stay if he ate the TV remote?"

"Of course! Nothing he can do will bother me. We're like brothers, Nutty and I," Emmet replied, "Why do you ask, Bella?"

Bella pointed.

"ACK!" Screamed Emmet, "YOU EVIL SQUIRREL! How could you EAT the remote! Now we can't watch TV until we get a replacement!"

Jasper, Carlisle and Edward all looked exceedingly distressed at this, but hid it quickly, instead shooting Nutty death glares.

"You can still watch DVDs," Alice said helpfully.

"Not if 'Nutty' succeeds in eating the DVD player," Rosalie said, pointing at machine.

Nutty did succeed before they could intervene.

"Wait… vampires can't eat," Bella protested.

All heads snapped to Emmet.

"I admit it…" He said, "I CREATED A MONSTER!"

They stared with no trace of amusement.

"Uh… I did say Nutty was an _experiment_, correct? Not merely trying to turn a squirrel into a vampire."

"What've you done?" Edward groaned.

"Stop that squirrel eating my lamp!" Esme screamed, and they all darted after the squirrel.

Nutty ran off to the next room, all vampires in pursuit.

Bella waited in the living room, picking at the cake Esme had given her, before picking up a cookie and beginning to munch that instead.

She wished she could help, but it sounded as though they were all using their super speed.

Bella could hear the feet pounding in various rooms and every once in a while a crash, an "Over there!" or a "HOW IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A SQUIRREL TO EAT THAT!"

It was actually quite entertaining if you thought about it.

Bella continued to nibble on her cookie and listen to the voices pursuing the squirrel. She could tell from Emmet's voice that he wasn't quite so keen on keeping him any longer.

"Where'd he go?" Bella suddenly heard seven vampires suddenly exclaim, which made her wonder how a squirrel had given them the slip.

And then, there is was.

Nutty suddenly shot out a hole _in the ground_!

And its beady little eyes were fixed on Bella's cake.

"Oh no you don't!" Bella yelled and swatted at it, but it bared its teeth and gulped the cake in one bite.

Bella gulped too.

Now the squirrel looked at the cookie in Bella's hands hungrily.

"E-Edward?" Bella called quietly, but Edward and the rest of the vampire were already there.

"Don't. Move," Carlisle whispered.

Jasper, suddenly realized how ridiculous this scene was couldn't keep back a laugh.

All heads snapped to him, but then to the squirrel.

Nutty jumped up and Edward lunged at him, ready to catch the squirrel, but the squirrel disappeared.

"Where the heck did he go!" Asked a frustrated Edward.

"There!" Bella said, pointing out another hole in the floor identical to the one Nutty had come out of.

"No way!" Rosalie yelled, "It digs holes!"

"It's in the floor…," Esme stated and they all looked around anxiously.

A skittering noise ran up the wall.

"IT'S IN THE WALLS!" Bella shrieked.

"This is like… a bad horror movie!" Jasper managed between laughs.

"Be that as it may, Jasper, I will NOT allow it to wreck my house!" Esme was watching the ceiling, were the skittering had last stopped.

Suddenly, Alice snapped her head up at Emmet and pointed her finger at him.

"YOU!" She said. Emmet gulped. "You ruined my slumber party! It was supposed to be a normal night of human fun to have with Bella and you had to go and-" At this point something dropped out of the ceiling into her hand, but she was so into her lecture, she didn't even stop talking as she flicked it out of the window, thinking it a bug.

Bella and the other vampires stood speechless as they watched Nutty flying through the window, emitting a sound that sounded suspiciously like, "WHEEEE!"

They all ran to the window.

"I wasn't finished!" Alice told Emmet.

"You got rid of the squirrel, Alice," Bella congratulated, slapping a high five.

"Cool," Alice said happily.

"No WAY!" Edward shouted. "We're going after it."

"Are you joking?" Emmet asked him.

"He. Has. My. Car. Keys." Edward growled.

Wordlessly, they went outside and followed the squirrel into the forest.

They were searching the woods when suddenly Nutty appeared from the trees.

And tried to steal Rosalie's anklet.

"Get away, rodent!" She whacked at him with her purse (she didn't want to leave it at home.

"Shhhiinnnnyyyyy," the squirrel said.

Rosalie froze.

"It spoke," Jasper said, incredulous.

"It didn't teach him, I swear!" Emmet said, a little too quickly.

"Rosalie, give him the anklet in exchange for my car keys, PLEASE!" Edward pleaded.

"No way!" Rosalie suddenly regained her power of speech, "I got this at my 25th wedding!" (A/N: Notice how she said 'wedding', not anniversery')

"Please? I'll buy you another one! And something else!" Edward continued.

"Oh fine," Rosalie said, taking it off.

"Hey! I got you that!" Carlisle complained.

"I'll pretend the new ones from you," Rosalie assured him.

Carlisle nodded.

"Nutty," Emmet started, "We give you shiny, you give us keys."

"Shhhhhiiinnnny," Nutty repeated, then darted off.

They shrugged and followed him, arriving in a meadow (not _the_ meadow) just in time to see Nutty finish uncovering a pit in the group, filled with sugary food and shiny things.

"Wow," Esme said, "And I thought Emmet was a packrat."

"I'm standing right here, you know! Hey… wait a second. That's my gameboy! Give it back, Nutty!"

The squirrel looked expectantly at Emmet. Grumbling, Emmet fished out a shiny quarter from his pocket and gave it to Nutty. Nutty tested it with his teeth, accidentally breaking off a corner in the process. He seemed satisfied, and gave the game to Emmet.

They then gave Nutty Rosalie's anklet and Nutty gave Edward his car keys.

Nutty then squeaked something, and Emmet translated: "He says he'll escort us out of the woods, but then we're on our own."

"Thank goodness," Rosalie sighed.

"What's in the Gameboy anyway, Emmet?" Jasper asked.

"Uh, let me check. Oh, Kim Possible," Emmet replied.

"You play Kim Possible?" Rosalie asked.

"I get to be Ron," Emmet explained.

"Hey! You borrowed that from me two weeks ago, Emmet! That was a gift from Renee and Charlie!"

"Oh, sorry, Bella," Emmet apologized, then justified it by adding, "You're to old for it anyways."

Bella nodded her agreement.

Just then the squirrel sang, "_Call me, beep me, if you want to reach me!"_

All heads turned to the squirrel, who, oblivious to their scrutiny, continued, "_Danger, or trouble, I'm there on the double. KIM POSSIBLE!"_

Bella summed up all their feelings with one sentence, "That's just too weird."

Disclaimer: Twlight belongs to Stephanie Meyer. Kim Possible belongs to Disney Channel. The rabid vampire squirrels are Emmet's.

Author's Note: Thankyou, LunarTears, for beta reading!


	9. Midnight Horror

**Author's Note: I'M ALIIIIIIIIVE!!! I'm soooo sorry I haven't updated this sooner. I'm not surprised if you thought me all dead o0 But I'm not, so here's another chapter. Hope you enjoy!**

**And if any of the Cullens show fear at any point, it's because they're excellent actors, and they do it for Bella's benefit.**

_Midnight Horror_

"LEAVE! NOW!" Alice bellowed at the Cullens guys, who were currently trying to convince the girls to play a game a twister. Who knew vamps took exile so hard?

At Alice's shrieking though, they decided now would be a good time to leave after all. When they started backing up towards the door, Alice beamed at them and handed them a twenty dollar bill for a movie, then promptly shut the door with them outside.

For a moment, the girls just stared at the door. Then Esme said, "Well, I have some errands to do. Sorry girls. I'll see you around though, ok?"

"All right, see you Esme!" Bella said. Rosalie and Alice voiced they're own farewells.

Again, they stared at the door closed. They were all alone. By themselves. No guys. No adults (unless you counted Alice and Rosalie's many years). No Esme.

"WAHOO!" Alice squealed. "Now we can party!" She cranked up the boom box in the corner of the room to some loud rock music. The three girls began dancing, whirling around the room in crazy circles that made no sense to anyone but them.

After a CD's worth of music, Bella collapsed on the couch, proclaiming she could dance no more.

Alice turned down the music, and then she and Rosalie plopped down beside Bella.

"Well, that was fun," Bella panted, a little red faced.

Alice nodded. "You know, later we really should do some karaoke. That would be wicked awesome!"

Rosalie cheered.

"I dunno," Bella mused. "Would anyone be here but us?"

Alice shook her head. "I noticed you danced without protest too, Bella." She grinned at Bella, who returned the smile.

They collapsed into silence. The music in the background sang "_I know there's something out there. I think I hear it move. I've never felt like this before-"_

And then everything went black. No, Bella did not randomly faint. The lights were off, the music had halted, and the clocks blank.

A crack of thunder boomed in the room. They had failed to notice the approaching storm.

Bella stared in wide eyes around her. "Did the power get knocked out?" She whispered.

Alice nodded, "Must have."

Eerie silence.

Then a scratching at the window. Bella whimpered.

"What is it?" She said, too quietly for a non vampire to hear.

"I don't know," Alice whispered back.

Lighting suddenly illuminated the sky, silhouetting a pale figure of someone clawing outside at the window.

"IEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!" Bella, Alice, and Rosalie's screams penetrated the darkness.

Meanwhile, at the movie theater

"Finally," Carlisle sighed. "I thought the previews would go on for_ever!"_

Emmett jabbed Jasper suddenly with his elbow. Jasper looked at him confusedly, but then interpreted his glance. Oh. Time to put Emmett's prank into action. He sighed.

"Hey," Jasper said tiredly, "My cell phone is vibrating. I'm gonna go answer it. Be right back."

He slipped gracefully between the rows and headed out into the night, running towards his families house. As he ran, he smeared black paint over his face. The paint had actually been one of the things on the scavenger hunt. Most of the items had been pranking supplies.

Emmett owned him big time for this.

Back at the house

Alice, Bella and Rosalie crept from the kitchen into the front hall. The figure outside the window had disappeared, but would surely come back, this time to a door. Alice was sure of this, though she hadn't had a vision.

They had armed themselves in the kitchen with weapons. Rosalie and Alice had cooking pots and Bella gripped a frying pan so hard her knuckles turned white. She kept repeating to herself that nothing could go wrong with Rosalie and Alice around. Just in case, she slipped a carving fork into her other hand, which Rosalie and Alice either didn't see, or didn't comment.

The lighting outside persisted in its constant flashing, building up the tenseness of the situation.

Then they heard something on the stairs. It was inside.

_How did he get in here without us knowing?! _Bella thought, fearing to voice her question out loud.

And evil sounding chuckle came from the point they heard the creaking. Then it rushed down the stairs before them, crying out a dreadful war cry.

But they were ready for it.

To Bella's eyes, all see could see were the white eyes and a dark form. The face was too dark to see any features.

It grabbed for Bella, but Bella swung her frying pan, which collided with its skull, just as Alice cried out, "WAIT-"

Their attacker fell limply to the floor.

"I _killed_ it. OH MY GOSH, I KILLED SOMEONE! I'll go to jail for this!!! I don't want to go to jail!" Bella said eyes wide. She dropped the frying pan.

Suddenly the figure leapt up. Bella used the blunt end of her carving fork to knock him to the floor again.

"I KILLED HIM AGAIN!!!" Bella wailed.

Alice broke in, voice stone cold. "Jasper, get up. Now."

With what sounded suspiciously like a whimper, Jasper complied.

He looked to the hard faces of the three girls and winced. Then he took in Bella's carving fork.

Jasper blinked. "Wow. Bella, you hit hard."

Bella nodded, face hard, though inwardly rejoicing her apparent freedom from jail, since Jasper couldn't be hurt that way.

But he could be hurt the way Rosalie stepped up and yanked him forward by his collar. "WHO SENT YOU!!!!????!" She roared.

Jasper cringed. "I can't say!" He cried.

"I _said_, 'WHO SENT YOU," Rosalie repeated.

"I told you! I can't say!"

"Hey Jasper," Bella said, her voice not showing any of her earlier fear, instead sounding quite pleasant. "Want to sit in the make-up chair?"

"IT WAS EMMETT!" Jasper yelled and broke away from Rosalie.

"So Emmett told you to scratch at the window, and then sneak into the house? He's loosing his touch," Alice scoffed.

"Yeah, well...," Jasper paused, eyes widening suddenly. "Ummm… I didn't scratch at any windows."

Dead silence followed this announcement.

"You're. Freaking. Joking." Bella said.

"Wish I was," Jasper whispered.

At that precise moment, the door burst open and once again, framed by lighting, stood the pale figure.

At the theater

"I've seen this movie before," Edward yawned.

"How can you?" Carlisle said, kind of snarky-ish. "It's a brand new movie!"

"Meh," Edward agreed. "But it's a remake."

"You're impossible," Carlisle groaned. "It is _not!_ It's completely redone!"

"Same characters," Edward said, as if that explained it at. Suddenly his head snapped to look at Emmett. "Why do you keep looking at your watch? Got a date or something?"

Emmett shook his head vigorously and tried not to look at his watch, hoping they wouldn't realize they same thing he had.

"Hey wait a minute," Edward said, picking up on his mind vibes, "Where's Jasper. It doesn't take _that _long to answer a phone call."

"Ummm… must be… Miss Carlotta!" Emmett said suddenly.

"Uh… who?" Edward left eyebrow rose an inch.

"Yeah, Miss Carlotta!" Emmett repeated, an idea forming. "He's settling his singing contract with her. You know how hard those things are to work out."

"Jasper's getting a singing contract?" Carlisle asked, nonplussed. "I never knew."

"Heheh," Emmett laughed nervously. "Who knew? I better go check and make sure everything is all right. You guys stay here. If I'm not back in ten minutes. Do _not_ leave the theater."

"Umm… aren't you supposed to tell us that we're supposed to call for help then?" Edward asked.

"DON'T LEAVE THE THEATER!" Emmett yelled, the tension clearly getting to him a bit.

He paused before taking off down the aisle. "Here, read this if you get bored, Edward." Emmett reached under the seat and pulled out a Harry Potter book and handed it to Edward before darting out.

At the house

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The screams echoed around the house at the Cullens greeted none other then….

THE PIZZA MAN!!!

"AHHHHH- oh. Hi." They broke off upon seeing the familiar red uniform. The pizza guy, to his credit, had only broken into a sweat, and had not run screaming away at such a greeting.

"…," The pizza man, stared on with wide eyes. "I… forgot… your dessert pizza…!"

"Whee! I love dessert pizza!" Boomed a voice right behind the Pizza man. He fainted.

"Guess I should have announced my presence better," Emmett said regretfully. Emmett took the dessert pizza from the guy's limp grip and hauled the pizza man into a standing position.

Emmett shook him lightly. He woke up fast. "Huh? Where am I?"

"You fainted, Dude," Emmett said casually, as if Pizza Men fainted around him everyday.

"No way!" The pizza man protested, going into defensive mode instantly. "I do _not _faint!"

"Pffft," Rosalie, Alice, and Bella snorted at once.

"A, that's really creepy how you three do that a once," Jasper said, "And B, why are you 'pffft-ing' the fainting guy?"

The 'fainting guy' started to protest, but Bella interrupted with a roll of her eyes. "It's the 'tough guy act'."

"Mhm," Alice agreed. "So annoying."

"So last never," Rosalie nodded, with a flip of her hair.

The guys present looked on, kind of startled by this show of resentment.

"Ummm…," the Pizza guy said, not quite sure what to say.

Everyone stared at him. Tense moment… you could cut the air with a knife.

"BOO!"

Screams filled the air once more (FYI, the Pizza Man screamed the shrillest; Emmett was close though. Heheh).

The lights flicked on.

"Hee hee. I say, I haven't had such fun in ages," Carlisle chuckled, a bemused Edward at his side.

Bella's eye twitched dangerously.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Emmett roared, making the Pizza guy look even more scared. "I TOLD YOU NOT TO LEAVE THE THEATER!!"

"But the movie was bored us," Edward explained.

Emmett's voice sounded dangerously hysterical as he said, "Then why didn't you read the bloody book?!"

Edward blinked and said simply, "There was only one copy. Carlisle was bored too."

Emmett twitched.

"Plus we were kinda suspicious," Edward said. He surveyed the area with interest.

Pale Bella

Emmett holding semi limp Pizza guy

Said Pizza guy looking scarred for life

Jasper with black face paint

Alice and Rosalie with cooking pots

Bella holding carving fork

You do the math

"I see my suspicions were correct," Edward said, coolly as ever.

Bella dropped her carving fork, nearly stabbing the Pizza Man's foot.

"I'm out of here," The Pizza Man said and ran for it.

"But… I was going to give you a tip!" Alice called after him. "Ah well." She shrugged.

"Now what?" Emmett asked.

Everyone turned angry eyes upon him.

Emmett gulped. "Um…mercy? Please? Uhhh…. HEEEEEEEEEEELLLLP!!"

His plea was answered an instant later by the sound of chewing, followed by another blackout.

Then the sound of chuckling and a few chorus's sung by helium voices of the Kim Possible theme song floated through the house.

**Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed! Next chapter: Karoke!!! MWHAHAHAHAHA!!! That should be fun, yes? **

**Trivia question for the day: Can anyone name the song and/or the singer of the song that was played just before the power went out the first time?**

_Disclaimer : Twilight belongs to Stephanie Meyer, not me._

_Kim Possible – Disney_

_Song before black out – Doesn't belong to me either –sob- I will credit in the next chapter though, cause I want you to guess at it :D_


	10. Karaoke Part 1

Author's Note: Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Nice to see you again so soon. Well… not really see... because… well, you know. Anyway!

If you guessed that last chapter's mystery song was Scared by Three Days Grace; YOU ARE CORRECT!! Congrats:)

As I said in the last chapter, this one's karaoke. And you thought the last chapter was scary. BWHAHAHAHAAAAA! Hope you don't mind all the song space in it. Some of the songs I 're-vamped' (mwhahaha; love that pun) and some are left along. So skim, skip or whatever. :D

So…. None of the songs I used are mine. Mostly oldies and… other stuff. I think I'm going to do a two part karaoke chapter, so if you have any suggestions, feel free to send them in, but please do not be offended if I don't use your idea. I like using songs I'm familiar with.

And I understand a certain part of this story (you'll know it when you read it) is a bit OOC for Edward, but he was pressured to do it by the other guys.

Please note no offense was intended to any of the characters of Twilight and if anyone finds it offensive, please let me know.

Lastly, thank you everyone who has reviewed this fic and doubly thanks to those who keep coming back and reviewing. You know who you are XD I could nae do it without ye.

_**Chapter 10 – Karaoke Time**_

_Run in Terror, Bella, Run_

"Well," Bella sighed. "Glad that's over."

The other girls nodded. The last excitement of the evening had taken a while to clean up. The power had to be restarted. Bella's saucepan had to be un-dented. Edward had to be sent to stalk the pizza guy to make sure he didn't think they were out of ordinary in any way except for being armed with kitchen utensils. And finally, the girls had had to make Carlisle and Emmett beat it. It wasn't easy, but they had finally managed, shipping the boys off to another movie, this time one they couldn't protest.

The girls were already places bets on how long it would be before they turned up again, but, hey, it was worth a try anyway.

"So," Bella continued, "What's next on the agenda, ay?"

"Karaoke," Alice said firmly. "Definitely karaoke. You wriggled your way out of somehow before, Bella, but now your destiny is inescapable."

Humored by the melodrama, Bella turned to share a look with Rosalie, only to be horrified when she found Rosalie staring at her with the same serious expression.

Bella sighed in defeat. "Fine. I can see it's unavoidable."

"WhaHOOO!" Alice shrieked. "This is going to be SOOO much FUN! I'm going to get the Karaoke machine. Rosalie, you feed Bella. You know what I want to feed her. The stuff we talked about before."

She and Rosalie exchanged another serious look, making Bella quake.

"Um…. What food guys?" Bella tried to ask, but was pulled away by Rosalie to the kitchen.

"Here," Rosalie said, stopping in front of a kitchen pantry. "It's all yours. Alice got it for you; she was so excited for tonight. She said it would keep you awake."

Now very intrigued, Bella slowly and suspensefully opened the door. Her jaw dropped in horror and glee.

It was a child's (or anyones!!!!!) dream. Candy, cookies, chocolate, cakes, cotton candy, chocolate, sugar and more CHOCOLATE!!!

The glee won out over horror and Bella leaped in the air.

"Wow, even the sugar fumes help you wake up," Rosalie remarked, thoroughly impressed.

When Bella continued to stand there in wonderment as any other mortal would do, Rosalie prodded her in with a long suffering sigh and locked the door after Bella. Rosalie strode off to go find Alice.

With Alice

"Aha!" Alice exclaimed jubilantly. "I knew I had this some where. The songs on it are a bit dated though… oldies and Disney classics? Ah well, can't be helped. Should be fun anyhow."

She hauled the machine into the room with the large television and proceed to begin plugging in the cables and turning on the machine. Sometime during this process, Rosalie wandered in.

"Oh, hey, Rosalie," Alice greeted absently, shoving a cord into a hole and hoping it was the right one. "Did you feed Bella?

"Uh huh," Rosalie said, plunking down on a sofa. "I locked her in The Room."

With a gasp, Alice straightened. "You didn't."

"I did," Rosalie said, somewhat indignantly.

In a flash Alice disappeared to the closet, where she found Bella eating some cotton candy in a surprisingly serene way.

"Hey Alice," Bella greeted. "Ready for Karaoke?"

Alice nodded, watching Bella suspiciously. What if she had built up immunity to sugar? Then again, she was sounding almost excited about karaoke…

"Ok," Alice began, once they assembled in the living room (which had the rug removed to improve slipperyness). "Let's get started!" She hit the play button on one song and she and Rosalie began to sing.

"_I come home in the morning light,  
My mother says when you gonna live your life right  
Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones   
And girls just want to have fun  
Oh girls just want to have fun!"_

Bella stared hesitantly. Was Alice serious? Wasn't this a kind of cliché song?__

"The phone rings in the middle of the night," Alice and Rosalie continued._  
"My father yells what you gonna do with your life!  
Oh daddy dear you know you're still number one."_

Alice elbowed Bella and Bella burst out,

"_But girls they want to have fun  
Oh girls just want to have— "  
_

Rosalie nodded approvingly and broke in with Alice:

_  
"That's all they really want:"  
_Bella: "_Some fun!"_

Just as they were about to head into the next chorus, the machine suddenly went dead silent.

"Dumb machine," Alice growled. "I thought it would work better than that. Rosalie, can you see if you can fix it? I would rather not do a run into town. I don't even know if the electronic store is open this late."

"Sure," Rosalie said and bent to fix it. Then Alice and Bella saw Rosalie lift her head a bit, gaze fixed behind the TV at something. Her expression turned confused as she said, "Emmett? What are you doing there?"

"What! Where's Emmett?" Alice asked. A blur behind the TV disappeared down a vent.

Suddenly Jasper was beside them, a pained look on his face as he escorted them to the couch and pointed for them to sit down. They did so, with glares, curious to see what would happen.

Then Jasper stood in the center of the room and Carlisle, looking nervous, stepped up to join him.

Then, Carlisle still nervous, Jasper even more pained looking, started the song Emmett had set it to, and the two vampires began to sing… or chant.

"_Bah, buh buh buh. Buh buh, buh buh, bah. Bah, buh buh buh bah."_

Now Emmett walked out between the two and began to sing.

" _I'm sleeping_

_And right in the middle of a good dream  
Then all at once I wake up  
From something that keeps knocking at my brain  
Before I go insane  
I hold my pillow to my head  
And spring up in my bed  
Screaming out the words I d__read ...  
"I think I love you!"_

The girls watched with narrowed eyes as Jasper and Carlisle joined the chorus.__

"This morning, I woke up with this feeling  
I don't know how to deal with  
And so I just decided to myself  
I'd hide it to myself  
And never talk about it  
And did not go and shout it  
When you walked into the room ...  


Then the weirdest thing happened.

Edward Anthony Mason Cullen came sliding in the room on his knees with a microphone held close to his mouth, singing:

_"I think I love you!"  
_

His slide ended perfectly in front of Bella. He leapt up dramatically and continued:

_  
__ "I think I love you  
So what am I so afraid of?  
I'm afraid that I'm not sure of  
A love there is no cure for  
I think I love you  
Isn't that what life is made of?  
So it worries me to say  
I've never felt this way_

Believe me  
You really don't have to worry  
I only want to make you happy  
And if you say  
Hey, go away, I will"

Bella frowned at the sincere-ness he sang this with.

_  
__"But I think better still  
I'd better stay around and love you  
Do you think I have a case?  
Let me ask you to your face  
Do you think you love me?"  
_

Edward grinned at Bella and if vampires could blush, he would be now.

_  
__ "I think I love you!_

Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper: (_I think I love you!)  
_Edward: "_So what am I so afraid of?  
I'm afraid that I'm not sure of  
A love there is no cure for  
I think I love you!  
Isn't that what life is made of?  
So it worries me to say  
Do you think you love me  
Do you think you love me  
Do you think you love me?"_

I don't know what I'm up against  
I don't know what it's all about  
I've go so much to think about  
Hey! I think I love you!  
So what am I so afraid of?  
I'm afraid that I'm not sure of  
A love there is no cure for  
I think I love you  
Isn't that what life is made of?  
So it worries me to say  
I've never felt this way

Edward:_ I think I love you! _

Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper: _(I know i love you)  
_Edward:_ So what am I so afraid of?_

Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper: _ (So afraid)  
_Edward:_ I'm afraid that I'm not sure of_

Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper: _ (I'm not sure)  
_Edward:_ A love there is no cure for _

Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper: _(There's no cure)  
_Edward:_ I think I love you _

Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper: _(I know i love you)  
_Edward:_ Isn't that what life is made of?_

Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper: _ (But im not sure yeah)  
_Edward:_ Though it worries me to say_

Emmett:_ Ooooh Weee Oooh_

Jasper: _ : glare at Emmett :  
I've never felt this way_

I think I love you! X10

Dead silence followed the ending of the song. Well, except for Jasper, Emmett and Carlisle's polite applause.

At the moment, the three girl's faces were completely blank with shock.

Then Rosalie's mouth curved into an amused smile and Alice looked torn between being miffed at the interruption and overjoyed with her brother's act.

Joy won and she leapt up. "Oh, Edward! That was wonderful!"

Edward ducked his head, embarrassed and carefully checked Bella's expression. Bella was blushing, but looking pleased with his performance. Edward smiled.

Before anything could be said though, Emmett whacked the karaoke remote a couple times and turned on a new song.

"My turn!" He boomed. "Who's up for the YMCA, revamped style?"

Surprisingly, Bella leaped up. Edward, having enough karaoke for now, sank in her spot.

Alice also joined Emmett, as did Rosalie and Carlisle. Need I say that Jasper had already taken a seat, despite Emmett's pleading glance.

"'Kay everyone," Emmett cheered, "1, ah 1, ah 1 2 3!"

Emmett: _"Young vamp, there's no need to feel down.  
_

_I said young vamp, pick yourself off the ground  
_

_I said young vamp, 'cause you're in a new town"  
_

Rosalie, Alice, Bella, Carlisle: "_There's no need to be un-hap-py!"  
_

Emmett:_ "Young Vamp, there's a place you can go  
_

_I said young vamp, when you're short on your dough,  
_

_You can stay there, and I'm sure you will find  
_

_Many ways to have-"_

Rosalie, Alice, Bella, Carlisle: "_A good time!"  
_

Emmett: _It's fun to stay at F O R K S  
_

All: _It's fun to stay at the F O R K S!_

_They have everything for young vamp to enjoy  
_

_You can hang out with all the undead!  
_

Carlisle: _Young vamp, are you listening to me  
_

_I said young vamp, what do you want to be?  
_

_I said young vamp, you can make real veggie dreams  
_

_But you've got to know that one thing:"  
_

Alice: "_No vamp can eat a human self,  
_

_I said young vamp, put your thrist on the shelf  
_

_And just go there, to the F O R K S  
_

_I'm sure Carlisle can help you today"  
_

_  
_Emmett: _It's fun to stay at the F O R K S  
_

All: _It's fun to stay at the F O R K S!_

_They have everything for young vamp to enjoy  
_

_You can hang out with all the undead!  
_

Rosalie: "_Young vamp, I was once in your shoes  
_

_I said: I was down and out with the blues  
_

_I felt no one cared if I was alive or undead,_

_Though I wanted to reform, I knew in my head!"  
_

Bella: "_That's when someone came up to me  
_

_And said young vamp, take a walk up the state,  
_

_There's a place there called the FORKS  
_

_They can start you back on your way!"  
_

ALL: _It's fun to stay at the FORKS  
_

_You can get yourself sparkly  
_

_You can have a good(veggitartian) meal  
_

_You can do whatever you feel (_Carlisle_: Except hunt humans!)_

Bella sank onto the couch panting. The other vampires laughed, energized. Alice had even forgotten to care about the boys butting in.

Esme entered then and took in the scene in a minute. With a smile, she pulled up Carlisle from his seated postion. Carlisle looked at her questioningly until she clicked on a song.

Together they sang the duet:

_  
"The beat goes on  
The beat goes on  
Drums keep pounding a rhythm to the brain  
La di da di de  
La di da di da_

Charleston was once a rage, uh-huh  
History has turned a page,uh-huh  
The mini skirts the current thing,uh-huh  
Teeny bopper is our new born king,uh-huh

Chorus

the grocery store the super mart,uh-huh  
little girls will break their hearts,uh-huh  
and men still keep on marching off to war  
electrically they keep a baseball score

Chorus

Grandmas sit in jail and reminesce  
Boys keep chasing girls to get a kiss  
Cars keep going faster all the time  
Bums still call hey buddy, have you got a dime"

Chorus

"WHooooooo!" Cheers rang out as they finished. "Go ESME! Go CARLISE!!"

Esme grinned and Carlisle looked embarrassed. Honestly. Guys.

"Who's up now?" Carlisle asked.

"Dunno," Emmett mused. "Let's do a blind vote."

"Why a blind vote?" Alice asked.

Emmett shrugged. "Sounds like fun to me."

Everyone gave a small sign of approval.

"I'll tally the votes!" Emmett grinned.

"No," Edward said calmly, "I think someone more trustworthy should do it. Jasper?"

"Whatever," He agreed. "Heads down everyone."

All heads went down, though Emmett was grumbling indignantly about being called untrustful.

Jasper reeled off everyone's name and counted the votes. When everyone lifted their heads, he announced who had been chosen.

"And the winner (or loser, depending on your standing on singing) is," Jasper paused suspensefully. "Bella Swan!"

Bella went very pale, while Edward, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett and Esme grinned suspiciously. Gee, I wonder who voted for her.

Bella also noticed this and mouthed, "I'll get you back for this" at them. She must have looked angry for the recipients of her glare looked frightened indeed.

Bella scrolled through the list of songs on the player, before deciding on one. "Umm…. I'm going, as Emmett said earlier, 'revamp' a song. Is that ok?"

"Of course, Bella," Edward said with his crooked smile.

Bella smiled nervously, blushed, and began:

"_In Washington there is a doctor showing photographs  
Of ev'ry head he's had the pleasure to know.  
And all the patients that come and go  
Stop and say 'Hello'."_

Carlisle grinned at Bella. She took a deep breath and continued.

_In La Push there is a boy who loves to fix a car,  
He loves to drive his car to Forks and back.  
Yet a car roof he seem to lack,  
In the pouring rain - very strange._

_  
Washington is in my ears and in my eyes,  
There beneath the cloudy grey skies  
I sit, and meanwhile back  
In Washington there is a golden retriever incarnate,  
And in his pocket is a portrait of the Queen._

Bella shrugged at the Cullen's inquisitive looks. It was hard finding a word to replace queen so quickly! And who knows…. Maybe Mike was British.

_  
He likes to keep his father's store very clean,  
It's a clean machine._

_  
Washington is in my ears and in my eyes,  
A bunch of fish and many recipes,_

_  
In summer meanwhile back  
In the school in the outskirts of the town,  
The happy girl has so much to say.  
And though she feels as if she's in a play  
She is anyway._

_  
In Washington, the Doctor cures another customer,  
We see the dog boy sitting waiting for a check  
And then the car fanatic rushes in  
From the pouring rain - very strange.  
Forks is in my ears and in my eyes,  
There beneath the grey suburban skies  
I sit, and meanwhile  
Forks is in my and in my eyes,  
There beneath the grey suburban skies...  
Washington!_

"Wow, Bella!" Alice leapt up. "That was cool!"

"Why was Jacob in your song?" Edward asked suspiciously.

"Some of that didn't make sense at all," Emmett mused.

Bella gave him a look. "You do better."

"Fine!" Emmett exclaimed. "I will!"

With a semi-snotty look at Bella, he began:

"_Way beyond the ocean beach  
A little down the state  
The forest and the lawn and peaks  
Are scheduled to be mine!"_

Esme raised her eyebrow, while the other gazed on with similar expressions of their disbelief._  
_

"_I'm gonna be the ruler  
Of most everything around  
From the grandest of the mountains  
To the humble common ground  
My reign will be a super-awesome thing  
Oh, I just can't wait to be king!_

"I'm going to be a coven's king  
And rule from Volterra!  
I only need a little time  
Perhaps a little mind control.

"I'm gonna be the undead event  
Better than Aro was before!  
I'm brushing up on looking down.  
I'm working on my roar! 

RRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRR_! "_

Bella clapped her hands over her ears.

_  
"The fauna and the flora are gonna swing  
Oh, I just can't wait to be the vampire king!_

With a pointed look at his family he sang the next verse.

_  
No one saying do this  
No one saying be there  
No one saying stop that  
No one saying see here_

Carlisle:leaping up: NOW SEE HERE!

_  
Free to run around all day  
I'll be free to do it my way_

Piano Solo

FYI, Edward rocks the classic Disney

During the Piano solo, Carlisle proceeds to chase Emmett around the room, Emmett goading him with many faces as he sings again:__

"No one saying do this  
No one saying be there  
No one saying stop that  
No one saying see here

Carlisle: _::last attempt:: NOW SEE HERE!!_

_  
Free to run around all day  
Free to do it my way_

The time has come  
As Caius said  
To talk of many things  
This may be true  
But I would rather stick to overthrowing kings

It's easy to be royal  
If you're already onion skinned  
It isn't just my right  
Even my left will be divine  
The monarchy is waiting to go zing  
Oh, I just can't wait to be king!

Emmett beamed. "Top THAT, people!"

"Oh I'll try," a cold voice said, causing everyone to gasp and turn in their seats.

There, framed in the doorway, was none other than…

…..

………

……….

…..

_**ARO OF THE VOLTERRI!!!!!!!!**_

**Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed! What do you think? Karaoke good? Bad? More? Less?**__

_Songs Used (that ARE NOT mine):_

_Girls Just Wanna Have fun : Dunno_

_I think I love you : Also Don't Know_

_YMCA : still dunno_

_The Beat Goes on : Sonny and Cher_

_Penny Lane : The Beatles_

_Just Can't Wait to be King : Disney_


	11. Karaoke Part 2, or Party Crashers

_Author's Note: Helloooo. I recently stumbled upon a forum topic, that surprise, surprise, mentioned me and my fics. But, it turned out, this was not a fanfic discussion topic, but a fanfic _bashing_ topic. And they're newest punching bag? My other fic which some of you may have heard of, _Amusment Parks with the Cullens. _So, I'm sorry to be wasting space with this, but I just wanted to give a shout out to those fic bashers: Next time, I hope you have the courage and the decency to _say it to my face! _And that goes not only for my fics, but for whoever else you're going to flame behind their backs._

_That miffed me that they were so eager to critique on a faraway forum, but they couldn't post a review to explain it to me. So why didn't they inform me of the errors I made? Surely that would help to improve the quality of my writing in the future. But, apparently, they wouldn't want the story to improve, because then what would they bash? I'm not going to say anything more about it, cause it just ticks me off worse._

_Anyway._

_Sorry about that. I just needed to get that out._

_Author's Note 2: Gah. I feel like every time I post a chapter, I'm coming back from the dead. I'm am so SO sorry about the late updates; I've been having a lot of trouble getting on often :( That, and my inspiration faery likes to leave me hanging, and then laugh at my from a corner of the room. Sigh. Blame the faery (just kidding! _Respect _the faery. Haha) _

_Author Note 3: Oh and hey, if you don't want to read through all the songs, it's okay. I've changed some of the words, but I understand if you don't want to read through everything._

_Author's Note 4: Anyway, Sorry about the wait, especially after that cliffie! Thanks for all the reviews!! I'll leave this author's note short, so you can hurry and find out the answers to these questions:_

_What is Aro doing in the Cullen's living room?_

_What will happen next?_

_Will Emmett be trialed for treason?_

_What the heck does Billy Black have to do with anything?_

_And most importantly:_

_WILL ARO SING??_

_P.s. Songs are in Italics, any actions during a script format segment are bracketed by two 1s, example (Edward: Why me?! 1bangs head against piano1)_

_**Chapter 11 – Karaoke Time, Part Two**_

_**Or**_

_**Party Crashers**_

When we last saw the Cullens:

_Emmett sings enthusiastically, _

"The time has come  
As Caius said  
To talk of many things  
This may be true  
But I would rather stick to overthrowing kings!! HAH!"

It's easy to be royal  
If you're already onion skinned  
It isn't just my right  
Even my left will be divine  
The monarchy is waiting to go zing  
Oh, I just can't wait to be king!"

_Emmett beamed. "Top THAT, people!"_

"_Oh I'll try," a cold voice said, causing everyone to gasp and turn in their seats._

And now:

ARO OF THE VOLTURRI stood framed in the doorway, his face, mostly obscured by darkness, appeared to be a mask of livid rage.

Bella squeaked in fright and Edward, scowling moved to stand protectively in front of her. Shock was plain on the faces of all the Cullens. That and horror.

But then, Aro stepped into the light and they saw not rage, but evil glee upon his face.

"Ha, ha," Laughed Aro, "A fine show, I'm sure. But that's peasant stuff. A _real_ ruler could beat that warbling in his sleep!"

"Pfft," Emmett snorted, his shock/horror overcome by righteous indignance. "You sure talk big."

"Pfft," Aro snorted right back. "I sing big too!" He stepped inside the spacious room, and inclined his head towards outside. "Marcus! Caius! Inside, if you would. Ha, ha! This shall be entertaining indeed!"

The Cullens watched with foreboding as Marcus and Caius stepped into the light, looking bored with the whole ordeal.

"You don't have the terror twins with you, do you?" Bella asked without thinking.

"Alas, no. My sweet Alec and Jane are busy with other things. So you just have us," Aro said.

"Why are you here?" Edward snarled. "You can't turn Bella!"

"Yes, you can!" Bella contradicted and made to step forward, but Edward blocked her.

"Ha, ha! Nonsense, nonsense," Aro disagreed. "We're are merely here…" He paused suspensefully.

"Because Aro was bored," Marcus interrupted dryly.

Aro's face fell for a millisecond, but regained his enthusiasm. "But! Luckily we came just in time to interrupt this…err…" He struggled for a word, "This… Blasphemy!!"

"Dude," Emmett said calmly. "No _one_ can beat that last act."

Aro's eyes narrowed, then he sang in a powerful, though surprisingly high voice, "_Anything I you can do I can do better I can do better"_

"_Hah_!" Emmett barked.

Aro danced over to stand beside Emmett, crossing his arms over his chest and looking at him scathingly.

Aro: _I can do anything better than you_

Emmett: _No you can't_

Aro: _Yes I can_

Emmett: _No you can't_

Aro: _Yes I can_

Emmett: _No you can't_

Aro: _Yes I can_

_Yes I can_

_Yes I caaaaan!_

Emmett: _Anything you can be I can be greater;_

_Sooner or later I'm greater than you!_

Aro: 1smugly1 _No you're not_

Emmett: _Yes I am _

Aro: _No you're not_

Emmett: _Yes I am _

Aro: _No you're not_

Emmett: _Yes I am_

Aro: _No you're not_

Emmett: _Yes I am_

_Yes I am _

_Yes I am!_

Emmett: _I can catch a grizzly, even when it's drizzly!_

Aro: _I can read a mind, Except the weird kind. 1points at Bella1_

Emmett: _I can live on only forest animals_

Aro: _And only on that?_

Emmett: _Yep!_

Aro: 1scoffing1 _So can a rat._

Emmett: _Any note you can sing I can sing higher_

Aro: _I can sing any note higher than you_

Emmett: 1higher1 _No you caaan't _

Aro: 1higher1 _Yes I caaaaaaaan_

Emmett: 1higher1 _No you caaaaaaaaaan't _

Aro: 1higher1 _Yes I caaaaaaaaaaaaaan_

Emmett: 1higher1 _No you caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan't _

Aro: 1higher1 _Yes I caaaaaaan!_

Emmett: 1higher1 _No you can't _

Aro: 1highest1 _Yes I caaaaaaaaaaaaan!_

Emmett: 1disbelieving1 _How _do_ you sing that high?_

Aro: 1indignantly1 _I'm a girl!_

Aro's group and Cullens: 1wide eyes1 AAAAH!

Emmett: 1too stunned for words1

Aro: 1also too stunned for words1 I DIDN'T MEAN THAT!! IT WAS IN THE FREAKING SONG!!

Emmett: 1still twitching1 _Any thing you can say I can say softer _

Aro:_ 1softer1_ _I can say anything softer than you _

Emmett: _1softer1No you can't _

Aro: _1softer1 Yes I can_

Emmett: _1softer1No you can't _

Aro: _1softer1Yes I can_

Emmett: _1softer1No you can't _

Aro: _Yes I can_

_1screaming, not softly1 YES I CAN!_

Emmett: _I can drink my 1glances and Bella and decides to emit word1 faster than a flicker_

Aro: _I can drink it quicker and get even sicker_

Emmett: 1proudly1 _I can open any safe_

Aro: _Without getting caught?_

Emmett: _You bet!_

Aro: 1whispering1 _That's what I though, you crook_

Emmett: 1glaring1 _Any note you can hold I can hold longer!_

Aro: _I can hold any note longer than you_

Emmett: _No you caaaaan't _

Aro: _Yes I caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan_

Emmett: _No you caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan't _

Aro: _Yes Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii._

Cullens and Aro's group: 1exchange worried glances1

Aro: _iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii_

Emmett: 1winces1

Aro: iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Bella: 1glances at watch and looks impressed1

Aro: iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Bella: 1shows watch to Edward1

Edward: 1looks impressed1

Aro: iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii can!

Emmett: _Yes, you caaaaan!_

Emmett: 1speaking1 _Where'd ya keep all that air?_

Aro: _1GASPforBREATH1_

Emmett: _Phew._

Emmett: _Anything you can say I can say faster_

Aro: _I can say anything faster than you_

Emmett: _No you can't _

Aro: _YesI can_

Emmett: _Noyoucan't _

Aro: _Yesican_

Emmett: _Noyacan't _

Aro: _YsIcn!_

Emmett: _I jump a hurdle_

Aro: _I can wear a girdle_

_Everyone: 0o_

Emmett: _I can knit a sweater_

Aro: _I can fill it better_

_Everyone: 0o_

Emmett: _I can do most anything_

Aro: _Can you bake a pie?_

Emmett: _No._

Aro: 1sadly1 _Neither can I._

Emmett: _Anything you can sing I can sing sweeter._

Aro: _I can sing anything sweeter than you._

Emmett: _No you can't _

Aro:

_Yes I can_

Emmett: _No you can't _

Aro:

_Yes I can_

Emmett: _No you can't _

Aro:

_Yes I can_

Emmett: _No you can't _

Aro:

_Yes I can_

Emmett: _No, you can't can't can't_

Aro:

_Yes I can can can_

Emmett: _No you can't/_ Aro: _yes I can__  
_

There was a pause before everyone before everyone except for Aro and Emmett burst out into applause.

Aro and Emmett were eyeing each other with newfound respect.

"Not to shabby," Aro complimented Emmett.

Emmett blinked in surprise. "You're not to bad yourself."

Aro exploded. "NOT TOO BAD?! I BEAT YOU EVERY TIME!!"

"Not EVERY time!!" Emmett argued.

The Cullens and the Volterri exchanged glances. This had happened before. It would be a long night.

The Swan House

Charlie was bored. Sure, it was late at night and normally he would be in bed, but not this time. He couldn't fall asleep, so instead he was watching the football game. Why couldn't he sleep? Because his daughter Bella, was sleeping over at her boyfriend's house! Sure, sure, she was sleeping over with her boyfriend's sister, but they all lived in the same house, right?

Despite all his worrying, he could not do anything silly, like go over there or call her. He knew that would only upset her.

This worrying was driving him mad though! He had to do something… Charlie continued to think. What to do, what to do. His eyes wandered around the room until they settled on the phone. Perfect. He'd call Billy.

The Black house – Living room

Billy Black was up late, for a different reason than his friend Charlie. His reason was merely because he wanted to finish the engrossing book he was halfway through. His son, Jacob Black, was in the kitchen fixing them both a late night snack.

Billy had just started the forty-first chapter when he was startled out of his revelry by the phone ringing.

Jacob poked his head in the living room to see if Billy was getting it. Billy gave him a dismissive gesture and answered it.

"Hello?" Billy greeted curiously. Who could be calling so late?

"Billy?" The voice was unsure, but recognizable as Charlie's. "Sorry to call so late."

"Oh, no problem at all," Billy assured him, smiling. "I'm up anyway."

"Ok. Thanks, Billy," Charlie replied. "What's up?"

"Reading. You?"

"The game," Charlie said simply.

"What's got you calling this late?" Billy inquired.

"Oh, just needed something to keep my mind off Bella's sleepover," Charlie laughed at his own silliness.

"Bella's sleeping over?" Billy said. "That's wonderful. Good to know she's made some good friends."

"Yeah," Charlie agreed, still laughing a little, "Only that her boyfriend lives there is what concerns me."

Billy suddenly went rigid. "Boyfriend? You mean Cullen?"

"Um," Charlie sounded surprised at Billy's tone. "Yes, Edward Cullen. Billy? Billy, are you there?"

The Black House – Kitchen

"_Boyfriend? You mean Cullen?"_

Cullen. The surname made Jacob start. He poked his head into the living room again. From his earlier tone, it was obvious Billy was talking to Charlie, especially because they were talking about Bella.

Charlie's voice replied to Billy's question, muffled, so Jacob couldn't hear the reply.

But he knew it must have been Cullen. The suddenly rigid posture of his father assured him of that. He felt a sting of resentment towards Edward Cullen.

"Charlie?" Billy's voice now was tired sounding, almost as if he was about to drop off there and now. Jacob saw right through his dad's charade. "I have to go now. It was nice talking to you."

He waited as Charlie sadly agreed and bade him farewell. Then Billy hung up the phone, his eyes bright and uncannily alert for so late.

"Jacob," Billy said, eyeing his son. "What would you say to a late night mission?"

Jacob bit his lip warily. "Missions" were usually ridiculous… especially after the last episode with the wall scaling hair dryer, but… Bella was with Cullen. Having a slumber party no less. Billy's plan would most likely involve crashing said party.

"I'm in," Jacob smiled grimly.

Billy smiled. "Good, I'll explain the plan to you in the car."

"Car? Where are we going?" Jacob tipped his head inquisitively.

Billy started wheeling his wheelchair to the doors, calling over his shoulder, "To get reinforcements."

……………………………..

"You told him WHAT?!" Billy gasped, choking on the chips he'd bought while waiting for Jacob to get back from phase one of the mission.

Jacob gave a 'what can you do?' shrug. "It was the only thing I could think of to get him out here."

"He's coming?"

"Yes."

Billy paused a moment. "Are you sure we should have called the boy? Maybe the girl would have been a better one to bring into it first."

"No," Jacob said confidently. "If the boy is involved the girl will come, and in turn, the others will also follow."

"If you say so," Billy said, proud of his son's planning.

…………………………

Mike Newton shivered in the crisp Washington air. His jacket was too light for his taste. He knew this was a bad idea, but he was going anyway.

He actually hadn't heard all of what the threatening voice had said, because he the TV had been turned up to loudly. There was some mention of Bella, which made him focus enough to catch something about meeting 'them' in the alley if he ever wanted to see Bella again. After that, the voice had given him directions and hung up before Mike could inquire further.

There was nothing better to do, so he went.

Mike peered cautiously down the alley. As each second passed, the whole scheme seemed more and more ridiculous.

…but he really wouldn't like to never see Bella again…

He started down the dark ally. The darkness was so complete, he could hardly see where he was walking. In the center of the alley was a light, flickering on and off in a horror movie kind of way.

"Move into the light," Called a gruff voice, causing Mike to jump. Keeping Bella in mind, he obeyed. Now he could make out the figure of someone sitting in a chair just outside the light.

"Who the heck are you?" Mike asked. "And why are you sitting?"

"Don't SASS ME, BOY!" The voice barked. Then, into the light, rolled in none other than Billy Black, followed by his son Jacob Black.

Mike stared in surprise.

"Now here's what you have to do…" Billy began.

………………………………………………….

Back to the Cullens

…………………………..

Emmett was on the prowl for the next victim, err, singer, while Bella tried to back inconspicuously into a corner.

"Ha ha," Aro laughed gleefully, also surveying the other participants with an eager look. "Ah, I do love karaoke. Oh! Caius! Do you remember that time during our vacation to Japan! The first time I heard you sing. Yes, but it was lovely. Caius, my dear friend! You absolutely MUST sing for us!"

"Oh, I couldn't," Caius said dryly in a way that clearly meant 'wouldn't'.

"But you must, dear Caius!" Aro pleaded. "Only think of how sad we all will be should you deprive us of your angel tones."

"Really, you flatter me, but I must decline. Why don't we let Bella sing?" He added with a devious smile.

Aro didn't give up. "Yes, yes, we'll hear the girl later. But first, you, Caius. Come, friends, help me convince him!"

Everyone obediently clapped and called for him to step up. Caius scowled and remained in place.

Aro's face suddenly transformed into a terrible frightening mask. "Caius. NOW."

Though he still looked sulky, it seemed to be the push he need. He stepped up and put in some music.

When he began singing, Bella realized Aro was right, his voice was beautiful, and also deep, and a little scary combined with his interesting choice of lyrics.

Caius: _America!_

_Let's go back to war and violence  
I'm so bored with peace and SILENCE !  
Nights of evil, filled with fear  
Your worst dream, that's my idea of fun !  
Let darkness find it's sad ways;  
Let's go back to good old bad days  
No more foolish acts of kindness  
The Cullens and their kingdom will be mine !  
Years from now, no one will bother  
To recall your good friends Cullens  
Because all of this will be mine !  
This will all be mine !  
I have a plan; it includes you _

Caius paused to point to Bella, which made Edward glare, or course.

Caius: _You, Isabella, will lead me to America!  
Where I will claim all this is mine 1evil grin1  
In the back of your Chevy, my men will all hide  
You'll sit up front as the gates open wide  
Now watch me create my vampiric army with pride !  
Prepare for the dawning of a new age:  
The Caius age !  
Year One !_

Suddenly a hoard of squirrels appeared in the room, lining up behind Caius while he hummed with the music. Then… they began chanting. Emmett watched in interest.

Squirrels: _Bring on the darkness,_

_bring on the gloom,  
We are the army of death and gloom  
Bring on the darkness, bring on the gloom,  
We are the army of death and gloom_

_  
_Caius:

_Only one will be revered,  
Worshipped, hated, loved, and feared !  
I'd just like to say a few words:  
I, me, mine !  
You were mistaken if you believed  
Caius was someone who'd crumble and leave  
Now I am back, and I will be staying this _time !

_I told you once  
I told you twice !  
Everything you see before you  
Every last bit of it will...  
be...  
mine !!_

As the song ended, dead silence descended, save for the squirrels, who roared with applause and looked mighty pleased with themselves before disappearing. In the room, the room stared silently at Caius for a good ten minutes with expressions ranging from horror, fear, disbelief and delight.

"I didn't know you felt that way," Marcus finally said.

Aro beamed. "Ah, how lovely! Are you really planning on taking over America?"

Caius sighed in a long suffering way. "No, it's just a song."

Bella and the Cullens visibly relaxed.

"Yet," Caius added with a smirk, and Bella twitched.

"Ha ha!" Aro laughed, carefree. "Come, Bella! You must sing for us!"

"N-no, thankyou," Bella mumbled.

Aro looked saddened. "Oh, come now. Caius sang for the first time in many decades. Let us hear you."

Bella glanced at Edward, who motioned for her to go ahead. She hesitated.

Aro smiled sweetly. "I know. I'll sing with you!" He handed Alice a tape from his robe and she put it in, a knowing smile on her face.

Aro cleared his throat and sang:_ The only way to get what you want is to become a vampire yourself._Still unsure, Bella stepped out, remembering this song from the Little Mermaid, but not quite sure of the words. She glanced at the TV for assistance and concentrated on that to ignore those behind her.

Bella: _Can you do that?_

Aro:_  
My dear, sweet child. That's what I do. It's what I live for.  
To help unfortunate mortals like yourself.  
Poor souls with no one else to turn to._

I _admit that in the past I've been a nasty  
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a vampire  
But you'll find that nowadays  
I've mended all my ways  
Repented, seen the light, and made a switch  
To this  
And I fortunately know a how to turn one  
It's a talent that I always have possessed  
And dear lady, please don't laugh  
I use it on behalf  
Of the miserable, the lonely, and depressed (pathetic)_

_Poor unfortunate souls  
In pain, in need  
This one longing to live longer  
That one wants to get the girl  
And do I help them?  
Yes, indeed  
Those poor unfortunate souls  
So sad, so true  
They come flocking to my castle  
Crying, "Venom, Aro, please!"  
And I help them!  
Yes I do_

_Now it's happened once or twice  
Someone couldn't pay the price  
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals  
Yes I've had the odd complaint  
But on the whole I've been a saint  
To those poor unfortunate souls_

_Have we got a deal?_

Bella began wondering if this was just the song or if Aro was being silly… it was hard to tell.

Bella:_  
If I become human, I'll never be with my father or mother again._

Aro:_  
But you'll have your man, ha ha. Life's full of tough choices, isn't it? Ha ha.  
Oh, and there is one more thing.  
We haven't discussed the subject of payment._

Bella:_  
But I don't have-_

Aro:_  
I'm not asking much, just a token really, a trifle!  
What I want from you is - your voice._

Bella:_  
But without my voice, how can I-_

Aro:  
_You'll have your looks, your pretty face.  
And don't underestimate the importance of inhuman speed, ha!Come on you poor unfortunate soul  
Go ahead!  
Make your choice!  
I'm a very busy vampire and I haven't got all day  
It won't cost much  
Just your voice!  
You poor unfortunate soul  
It's sad but true  
If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet  
You've got the pay the toll  
Take a gulp and take a breath  
And go ahead and sign the scroll  
Caius, Marcus, now I've got her, boys  
The boss is on a roll  
This poor unfortunate soul_

_Now, sing!_

Bella:_  
Aah...  
_

Aro:_  
Keep singing!_

Bella:

_Aaaaaah!_

Aro backed off stage while Bella sang. "Ha ha, see? It's not so hard to get someone to sing."

"Hmmm," Edward mused, eyeing Aro suspiciously. Jasper was trying not to listen to the song in a corner. The Little Mermaid still gave him the creeps.

"Edward, you must sing now," Bella said, coming out of the center of attention, her face bright red.

"All right," Edward said agreeably, stepping out. "I dedicate this song to my Bella! Hit it, Emmett!"

Edward:

_I thought love was only true in fairy tales  
_

Emmett: _Buh dum dum dum_

Edward:

_Meant for someone else but not for me._

_Love was out to get me  
_

Emmett: _Duh duh duh da dah_

Edward:

_Oh, That's the way it seemed.  
Disappointment haunted all my time._

Then I saw her face, now I'm a believer!

Edward suddenly drew Bella into the circle again and began dancing with her, while continuing to sing, smiling at her new blush.

Edward:_  
Not a trace of doubt in my mind.  
I'm in love, I'm a believer!  
I couldn't leave her if I tried._

I thought love was more or less a given thing,

Emmett: _Buh dum dum dum_

_Seems the more I gave the less I got.  
What's the use in tryin'?  
_

Emmett: _Duh duh duh da dah_

_All you get is pain.  
_

Emmett: _Duh duh duh da dah_

_When I needed overcast I got sun!  
_

All the couples in the room suddenly whirled in the center joining in the wild dancing as Edward began the next chorus. Aro made Marcus dance with him.

Edward:_  
Then I saw her face, now I'm a believer  
Not a trace of doubt in my mind.  
I'm in love, I'm a believer!  
I couldn't leave her if I tried._

_Then I saw her face, now I'm a believer  
Not a trace of dou-_

The music suddenly stopped along with all the power. Bella had only a second to wonder what was going on when suddenly the power was reconnected and music was starting from somewhere out_side._

All the vampires and Bella moved off the stage nonplussed as the door open and the music got louder, and a strange group of people moved in, carrying a portable CD player and starting to sing. Bella could only watch in shock as the people took turns singing lines as they appeared in the room.

Mike, looking way too smug:

_Here we come, walkin' _

_Down the street._

Jessica, giggling and hesitant:

_We get the funniest looks from _

_Ev'ry one we meet._

Jacob, looking positively evil:

_Hey, hey, we're the (party) CRASHERS_

_And people say we monkey around._

_But we're too busy singing_

_To put anybody down._

Tyler, looking curious:

_We go wherever we want to, _

_do what we like to do_

Eric, worried:

_We don't have time to get restless, _

_There's always something new._

All:

_Hey, hey, we're the Crashers_

_And people say we monkey around._

_But we're too busy singing_

_To put anybody down._

_We're just tryin' to be friendly,_

_Come and watch us sing and play,_

_We're the young gneration,_

_And we've got something to say._

_Any time, Or anywhere,_

_Just Look over your shoulder_

_Guess who'll be standing there_

Jacob was somehow able to appear behind Bella shoulder at this point, popping up as he sang the words. Bella screamed and Edward and Emmett threw Jacob (gently) to the stage where the others now were.

All:

_Hey, hey, we're the Crashers_

_And people say we monkey around._

_But we're too busy singing_

_To put anybody down._

_We're just tryin' to be friendly,_

_Come and watch us sing and play,_

_We're the young gneration,_

_And we've got something to say._

_Hey, hey, we're the Crashers_

_Hey, hey, we're the Crashers_

Silence. A squirrel hummed in the background (the squirrels had scared all the crickets off).

"Ha ha!" Aro finally broke the silence. "Delightful! What a bizarre surprise! Such strange mort-"

"What are you doing here?" Edward interrupted Aro, stepping forward.

Mike grinned. "We're crashing the party!"

"Why?" Edward asked, struggling to stay polite.

"We were paid," Jessica said bluntly.

Edward's eyes flashed to Jacob, but Jacob grinned and said, "Not Me!"

Edward read his mind. "Crafty old man," He grumbled.

"What should we do?" Carlisle asked too quietly for and humans to hear.

"Want me to take care of them?" Jasper asked grimly.

"OR ME!" Emmett said. "I want to arrest someone with my squirrels."

Carlisle looked alarmed.

"Oh, come on," Alice giggled. "Let them stay at least for karaoke. The more the merrier, right?"

Carlisle thought about it briefly and nodded. "So be it."

Mike was watching Aro. Aro was watching Mike. They stared. Mike turned away, but suddenly Aro was next to him.

"And who might you be?" He asked formally.

Mike coughed nervously. "Mike Newton, sir."

"Very good, Michael," Aro said. "You show bravery. You may stay."

"Oh no, sir, not Michael, you can just call me-"

"That will do, Michael," Aro said sternly, leaving no room for argument. Mike nodded meekly and Aro rejoined his group. "Well, who's next?"

The Crashers looked around nervously. They had crashed the party and suddenly were expected to stay. Jessica nudged Mike in the ribs and glanced to the door. Mike glanced at Aro, and Aro glared at him and moved to block the door. Mike shook his head at Jessica. They couldn't leave yet.

Alice broke the awkwardness by dancing forward into the center. The Crashers gratefully joined the crowd.

"Me and Jasper would like to do a song," Alice announced happily. "Play it, Carlisle."

Sweet music filled the room as Jasper stepped forward towards Alice, singing to her.

Jasper:

_Look at the future tell me what do you see  
Just close your eyes and describe it to me  
The heavens are sparkling with starlight tonight  
That's what I see through your eyes_

Alice, taking his hand:  
_I see the heavens each time that you smile  
I hear your heartbeat just go on for miles  
And suddenly I know why life is worthwhile  
That's what I see through your eyes  
That's what I see through your eyes_

Jasper:  
_Here in the night, I see the sun  
Here in the dark, our two hearts are one  
Its out of our hands, we can't stop what we have begun  
And love just took me by surprise, looking through your eyes  
_

Alice:

_I see a night I wish could last forever  
I see a world we're meant to see together  
And it is so much more than I remember  
More than I remember  
More than I have known  
_

Together:

_Here in the night, I see the sun  
Here in the dark, our two hearts are one  
Its out of our hands, we can't stop what we have begun  
And love just took me by surprise, looking through your eyes  
Looking through your eyes_

Everyone in the room felt their heart melt at the scene. Jessica glared at Mike and wondered what she had done to deserve someone who was so unromantic. The mortal boys in the room felt huge resentment toward Jasper suddenly for raising the standard so high.

"Beautiful!" Aro cried. "If I had tears, I would shed them for you. Brilliant! And now, brothers, Marcus, Caius, and Carlisle, you too, I think. Come forth. We shall sing together, for old times sake. Alice, dear, the music, if you will."

Aro and the three he called moved to stand beside him. They looked quite impressive and the mortals in the room all straightened their backs and tried to look like good people, afraid of bringing on the wrath of this foursome.

Aro, Marcus, Caius, and Carlisle:

_United we stand  
Now and forever  
In truth, divided we fall_

_Hand upon hand  
Brother to brother  
No one shall be greater than all_

_United we stand  
Now and forever  
In truth, divided we fall_  
_  
Hand upon hand  
Brother to brother  
No one shall be greater than all_

Aro:

_It's been ten years we celebrate  
All that made our kingdom great  
Liberty and Justice for all_

Carlisle:  
_Each of us will now divide  
In equal shares our countryside  
Promising equality for all who reside!_

All:  
_United we stand  
Now and forever  
In truth, divided we fall_  
Aro: _Liberty!_  
Marcus:_ Justice!_  
Caius: _Trust!_

Hand upon hand  
Brother to brother  
No one shall be greater than all

All: ._Shall be greater than all  
_  
Carlisle: _Freedom!_  
Edward:_ Peace!_  
Suprisingly, Bella: _Honour!_

All: ._No one greater than all_

Esme: _Goodness!_  
Emmett: _Strength!_  
Jasper: _Valour!_

All: _Shall be greater than . . .Allllllllllllllllllllllllllll!_

The foursome threw their arms skyward in a dramatic finish. Wild applause broke out. Emmett, clapping, stepped out and motioned them to be gone. After looking slightly offended, the foursome decided not to make a scene.

"I have a very special song for you now," Emmett declared. "And I will only sing it if… you all DANCE! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!"

Everyone exchanged hesitant glances and then nodded.

"What music, Emmett?" Carlisle asked, his hands hovering over the options.

Emmett looked at him seriously. "Carlisle, I'm afraid we don't have the music for it."

Carlisle looked slightly afraid.

Suddenly Emmett launched into a song that was not only not in the Cullen's extensive collection, but in another language entirely, one that the mortals in the room didn't even recognize.

To add to the random weirdness, and surprising everyone, Bella suddenly squealed, "THE NUMA NUMA SONG!" And started singing with Emmett.

Edward looked the most surprised of all.

But, true to their word, everyone started dancing, and with much enthusiasm, which was also surprising.

Emmett was so pleased by everyone's willingness to participate, that once he finished, he sang it again, faster. Everyone increased their pace dancing to keep up.

During the 3rd round, the inevitable happened. Bella tripped. Mike, who had been dancing close to Bella of course, tripped over her. Before Bella could get squished, Edward zipped her out of the way.

Though Bella was now out of the danger zone, it did not save the rest of the mortals, who tripped over Mike.

Emmett, seeing these events unfold, stopped singing and shouted, "DOG PILE!"

The mortals, except Jacob, who had been the only one to avoid tripping, screamed.

Luckily for them though, Carlisle and Jasper were able to restrain Emmett. The incident effectively ended Emmett's decidedly dangerous singing.

"Who shall sing next?" Aro asked.

(A/N: Jacob's gonna get out of character for a bit here. Please don't hate me)

Jacob stepped forward, a weird determined light in his eyes. "Me."

For some reason only mind readers know, Edward started snickering, which caused Aro to poke him and start snickering as well.

Jacob stepped onto the floor and pointed at Bella and began singing. He didn't dance, but he did jump around a lot dramatically.

Jacob: _  
Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I don't like your boyfriend!  
No way! No way!  
I think you need a new one  
Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I could be your boyfriend_

Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I know that you like me  
No way! No way!  
You know it's not a secret  
Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I want to be your boyfriend

You're so fine  
I want you mine  
You're so delicious  
I think about ya all the time  
You're so addictive  
Don't you know what I could do to make you feel alright?  
Don't pretend I think you know I'm darn precious  
And Hell Yeah  
I'm the one and only prince  
I can tell you like me too and you know I'm right

He's like so whatever  
And you could do so much better  
I think we should get together now  
And that's what everyone's talking about!

Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I don't like your boyfriend!  
No way! No way!  
I think you need a new one  
Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I could be your boyfriend

Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I know that you like me  
No way! No way!  
You know it's not a secret  
Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I want to be your boyfriend

I can see the way, I see the way you look at me  
And even when you look away I know you think of me  
I know you talk about me all the time again and again  
So come over here, tell me what I want to hear  
Better yet make your boyfriend disappear  
I don't want to hear you say his name ever again  
And again and again and again!

Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I know that you like me  
No way! No way!  
You know it's not a secret  
Hey! Hey! You! You!  
I want to be your boyfriend

Bella blushed furiously and looked annoyed. Mike looked admiring, as did Eric and Tyler. Edward looked both annoyed and amused. The others applauded, if not just for his courage alone.

Jacob himself was blushing at this point and retreated back to the crowd.

"Ha ha," Aro laughed. "Good job, young one!" Then Aro leaned down and whispered so Bella alone could hear. "Now it's your turn alone. You're going to prove your ability to keep our secret."

"How?" Bella gasped.

"By singing this," He whispered back and pushed her out.

Bella gulped and sang.

Bella:

_Let me know that I've done wrong  
When I've known this all along  
I go around a time or two  
Just to waste my time with you  
_

Bella grabbed Edward's hand and pulled him out to stand with her.

Bella:_  
Tell me all that you've thrown away  
Find out games you don't wanna play  
You are the only one that needs to know_

I'll keep it our dirty little secret  
Don't tell anyone or

_Ill be just another regret_

_Just another regret, _

_Hope that I can keep it  
Our dirty little secret  
Who has to know_

When we live such fragile lives  
It's the best way we survive  
I go around a time or two  
Just to waste my time with you

Tell me all that you've thrown away  
find out games you don't wanna play  
you are the only one that needs to know

I'll keep it our dirty little secret  
Dirty little secret  
Don't tell anyone or I'll be just another regret  
Just another regret, hope that I can keep it  
Your dirty little secret  
Your dirty little secret

_  
Who has to know?  
Who has to know?_

The Volterri laughed as she finished and the Cullens applauded and chuckled. The humans in the room clapped, confused about her song choice and word changes.

Before they could question it, Esme interrupted. "We'd like to do a song for the couples now. Everyone's free do dance and sing along." The music started.

Song, with random people singing at different times:

_Imagine me and you, I do  
I think about you day and night, it's only right  
To think about the girl you love and hold her tight  
So happy together_

If I should call you up, invest a dime  
And you say you belong to me and ease my mind  
Imagine how the world could be, so very fine  
So happy together

I can't see me lovin' nobody but you  
For all my life  
When you're with me, baby the skies'll be blue  
For all my life

Me and you and you and me  
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be  
The only one for me is you, and you for me  
So happy together

I can't see me lovin' nobody but you  
For all my life  
When you're with me, baby the skies'll be blue  
For all my life

Me and you and you and me  
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be  
The only one for me is you, and you for me  
So happy together

Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba  
Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba

Me and you and you and me  
No matter how they toss the dice, it has to be  
The only one for me is you, and you for me  
So happy together

So happy together  
How is the weather  
So happy together  
We're happy together  
So happy together  
Happy together  
So happy together  
So happy together (ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba)

Let's see how all the couples are doing shall we?

Emmett danced with Rosalie in some sort of strange dance that looked like some kind of cross between Square Dancing and Modern. Rosalie rolled her eyes, but smiled.

Edward had Bella step on his feet like they had at the prom and swirled around the room.

Awkwardly, the Jessica and Mike danced in a modern way that made them feel out of place, as Esme and Carlisle, and Alice and Jasper were doing a formal ballroom dancing type of thing.

Aro and a highly disgruntled Caius also spun around the room in a fast paced Ballroom dance, Aro laughing wildly and shouting about how he hadn't had so much fun since the time in Canada with the water balloons and jetpacks._  
_

Tyler and Eric were determinedly not looking at each other.

Some distance away, Marcus and Jacob leaned against the wall, looking bored. Jacob watched Bella, wishing he could dance too… maybe if he could get a partner to dance with him closer to the pair, he could ask Edward if he could step in…

Jacob turned to Marcus. "Hey dude, wanna dance?"

Author's note: MWHWHAHAHAHAHA!! I love imagining Jacob asking Marcus to dance.

Disclaimer: Twilight doesn't belong to me. Neither do the songs, which belong to Disney, Oldies singers, The Quest for Camelot people (if you haven't seen that movie, you should. Its one of the best little kid movies ever. Mwhahaha), Avril something…(I don't really listen to her music, but I've seen that one song on youtube for anime music videos so many times. It's funny) and All American Rejects (ditto on the note for Avril)

Author's note 2: I hope you enjoyed!! And please vote on the poll on my homepage if you care about which fanfic I update first. And thankyou so much everyone for reading and even more, reviewing! Your reviews are amazing and help me to finally sit down and write out the next chapter. This chapter is here cause of you. It amazes me the amount of reviews I still get from stories that have not been updated in a while. You all are amazing.


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